Let’s make s’mores.
The time left until my big, exciting appointment with the Endocrinologist is s. l. o. w. l. y ticking away. Every day seems like a year. Every minute seems like an hour in which the world is sitting on my shoulder saying, “You don’t hold us up very well, woman. Your shoulders are weak. You need to workout more.”
Tabitha D’umo looks at me from the cover of her stupid Dance DVD. Mocking me. I entertain thoughts of burning her face up in a bonfire as I dance around it, naked, in my front yard. But it is below freezing, and I can’t find my matches. Darn.
Last week was a long, long week. Lots of good. Lots of bad. We fight. I snip. I apologize. We butt heads. We talk. I cry. We laugh. We cuddle in bed and then fall asleep.
The next day, it happens all again. I just want to sleep all day. Can I please just sleep all day? I don’t want to be a human today. I want to sit in the corner and stare at the wall. Also. I want to stop having frizzy hair that breaks if you look at it wrong, and brittle nails that do the same. My back locks up and my neck goes stiff on me. I find patches of dry skin on my feet that look like this:

On the days when I can actually get out of the house (like Monday, thank you, Alli!) things feel better. The motto is, “Movement in Sunshine.” It seems to help with the Depression Symptoms. But the lump in my throat. That choking feeling. And that world. On my shoulders. Oy.
Please help me, Mrs. Endocrinologist. And tell me this paper you sent that says, “payment in full is due at time of service” was just a mean joke you like to play. Please?
Oh, look. I just found my matches. Wanna meet me in the front yard, my friends? Bring your marshmallows.
.
.
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Groovy Mom
Movement in sunshine is very very good. I’ve been trying to get more of that too. Been there. Right down to the itchy back. Do you know what’s going on there? I have a back scratcher hanging right next to my computer here. Ahhhh. Feels almost orgasmic to itch it.
Groovy Mom’s last blog post..Shit-Chat
Becky
I get all excited when I see a new entry pop up in my Bloglines from you. I look forward to looking at your photos….dookie, back fat, muffin tops, and now snake skin. Aww! So cute! LMAO
But seriously, you and I both could use a long bath in some seriously oiled water. Then afterward, maybe a coating of bacon grease…something that will REALLY seal in that moisture. LOL Cause the Aveeno ain’t working.
Becky’s last blog post..Bye Bye!
Thursday's Child
I call these sorts of days “Those Days.” In fact, here’s a tweet I had on the subject not too long ago: “Sometimes the world’s all black and grey, and no matter what, the clouds won’t stop brooding and plotting and growing and hiding the sun.”
Thursday’s Child’s last blog post..Tadaa!
Veronica
I have good marshmallows. And a stick. We can use my stick to roast the marshmallows, then poke the mocking DVD and then finally? We can use it to poke the Endo until she gives you drugs to make you better.
I’m not sure I feel about your front yard, don’t you like have people close? Wouldn’t they think it was weird? Transport yourself here to my summer environment and you can dance in peace.
Without goosebumps.
Veronica’s last blog post..The THING! You Know, That One That Makes Us Cringe. ***UPDATED
river
I’ll tell you an old wives tale, or Folk Medicine if you prefer to call it that. Try adding Apple Cider Vinegar to your diet. In recipes that call for vinegar, toss out the white stuff and use the ACV. It’s reputed to strengthen the immune system, also strenghten hair, skin and nails. A more direct way to take it is 1-2 teaspoons of the ACV, mix in two teaspoons of honey, top up with hot water, mix well, allow to cool so you don’t burn your mouth, then sip it with your meals instead of water. the first mouthful makes your mouth scrunch up like you’re eating lemons, but you get used to the taste. It certainly seems worth a try. I drink it daily in the winter, less often in the summer, because it’s just too hot for a hot drink then.
frogpondsrock
Yep follow rivers advice.. Apple cider Vinegar is great…
especially the hot vinegar with honey.. It will help your throat too sweety…
Failing that I have marshmallows too.. I will baby sit Braden and Amy whilst you and Veronica play with fire..
(((HUGS))) Kim xox
frogpondsrock’s last blog post..It is the wrong day..
Marylin
ok so except for the itching? I know how you’re feeling. I need to get out of the house every day or I start to go severely downhill, thing is that’s kinda difficult with the weater we have here in Scotland at the moment.
and the sleeping all day? yea I’m totally with you there… I NEED some more sleep!
I hope everything gets sorted out for you at the Endocrinologist appt. *hugs*
Marylin’s last blog post..Tons of ideas…
Solomon Broad
Mmmm, human-flavoured marshmallows! Where is my bottle of Chianti?
Good luck with the endocrinologist.
Solomon Broad’s last blog post..Monday 21 January
rye
Here, I’ve got some Denise Austin we can use as kindle
Hope your appointment is well worth the wait!
rye’s last blog post..crush
Beth_C
I’ll bring the graham crackers!
Good luck with the endocrinologist. I hope he can help you get everything sorted out so you are your normal lovely sarcastic self!
Beth_C’s last blog post..It was a good hair day…or so I thought.
Bipolarlawyercook
Ugh. I’ll add my voice to the chorus urging you to get out in the nice sunshine, even though it’s cold. I do it, and I’m in BOSTON. Brr. Sunshine makes a HUGE difference for me this time of year. And Aquaphor cream makes a big difference on my rosacead, chapped winter skin. That and L’Occitane pure shea butter in a can. Body Shop Mango Body Butter works in a pinch, though I smell like a smoothie for WEEKS.
Hang in there.
Bipolarlawyercook’s last blog post..“Just” sensitive?
Sister Honey Bunch
You poor thing! I’ve got nothing else to say but that. I feel so bad for you right now and hope you get some answers from the mean bill-giving doctor.
Sister Honey Bunch’s last blog post..We’ve Been Double Tagged
Dawn
ugh.
there will be chocolate.
ugh.
Dawn’s last blog post..6 truths and a lie
Kim
In addition to your dance dvds, the offer for the denise autsin as kindle, I have literally every mf workout dvd ever made that can keep the fire going until Braden goes to college. Imagine all the marshmallows we could eat!!!
I do hope you feel better soon..
Kim’s last blog post..The Adventures of Superman, Batman & Super Dog
Stephen
My wife has taught our five-year-old how to scratch her back, because I’m not always there to do it. Now Sarah asks me to scratch her back! It’s contagious!
Stephen’s last blog post..Finally, A Gift For Your Mother-In-Law.
Lou Lohman
More than likely, all that itching is from skin drying out in the heated house. If you have a humidifier, that would help , longer term. Short term, get the husband to do a little rub-in-the-moisturizer duty (back and feet). every night. Until you’re better. And even afterward. He should do that ALL THE TIME. If I can do that for Annie, he can do that for you.
You don’t suppose that makes me a woos, do ya’?
Lou Lohman’s last blog post..Tuesday 22 Jan
Twitter: lceel
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
Thanks for all the support, everyone. The dry skin really does drive me nuts. John’s really sweet about giving me oiled backrubs and such. And he even bought a special, oiled, massage lotion for my feet. I’m a lucky hooker, I know. (No, Lou, that does NOT make you a “woos,” but a great hubs.)
Also, we use ACV, but I don’t drink it. I’ll try that!
Thursdays Child – what a beautiful and poetic, if not morose, tweet. It quite matches my mood, and incidentally, the weather outside here, today. Rainy. Grey. Trapping me inside with my angst. Argh.
On the upside, I’m refreshing my 2008 Bloggies screen every 1.8 seconds today, to find out if I made it into the finals. That’s not at all obsessive, is it?
And if I did make it to the finals, you’re all going to vote for me, right? *raises eyebrow*
TX Poppet
Ditto on everything. I am coming to the bonfire and bringing my bongos. Hang in there!
TX Poppet’s last blog post..It’s the Little Things
Gretchen
All I have are the pink strawberry marshmellows – will those work?
For the dry skin, I can not say enough good things about Elta – it’s a ‘melting’ moisturizer that the burn doctor recommend. Unfortunately, it’s mostly available online and is a little expensive.
Gretchen’s last blog post..I miss work.
Jodi
I’m all for burning any and all exercise videos. The whole medical community??? blah. the insurance? blah. blah blah blah.
Jodi’s last blog post..Denying you have a problem is the first step
Lou Lohman
You know, for one frightening moment, I thought that might have been a picture of Kevin or Leroy. And I thought O.M.G. – but then I saw it was The Foot and since I don’t have a foot fetish, I was very relieved.
Lou Lohman’s last blog post..Tuesday 22 Jan
Twitter: lceel
Gordo
I don’t know what it is this winter, Lotus. I’m having a terrible time with mood and light levels this year. I LOVE winter, but I’m a terrible grump this year.
Good luck with the Endo. Bridget had to see one for gestational diabetes and she was a great help.
Gordo’s last blog post..Enough blasting, already!
justmylife
Wish all of our well wishes would make you feel better. I see we are all trying to help. Dry skin sucks, if you find a helpful remedy pass it along, I coud use it. Hope the doctor’s appointment gets here quick and the doc makes you feel better. They are greedy little things aren’t they? Keeping my eye on the Bloggy for your name too. You know you have my vote. Feel better.
justmylife’s last blog post..Bad Mommy
MP
Dry skin sucks..I don’t have it bad but hubby does. Yesteday though I had this patch on my knuckes..and OMG I must have lathered up w/ the lotion every 10 minutes..but then you have to wash your hands..don’t want to get sick..so it’s more lotion.
Can we buy stock in lotion?
MP’s last blog post..racist or prejudice – my soap box
badness jones
aw honey. I hope that the endocrinologist can sort everything out. I would interpret her demand for payment as “I will pay you once you’ve made me all better”. There are a lot of things in the States that I wish we had here, but the healthcare system isn’t one of them.
Big hugs. Feel better.
badness jones’s last blog post..Road Trip
Eve
I have so got you covered today. First things first: ” I have selected you to receive the coveted “You Make My Day Award.” I hope you will stop by my blog and pick it up. It is quite pretty and will add great color to your sidebar.” Your humor has helped me through many a bad day. Thanks.
I am the Queen of dry, itchy skin. I’m old, and I’m diabetic, and I live in the desert. The best thing I have found for my dry skin (I have lots of patches that look like your foot) is a really inexpensive Vitamin E cream I get from WalMart. It’s made by Fruit of the Earth and comes two jars stacked together and held with plastic wrap. It even relieves the chicken-feet look of my hands and takes away the redness and the itching. *blah, blah, blah*
Sunshine: for these grey winter days you need some light bulbs that give off ‘natural’ light. Or a membership at a tanning salon. Or both. Seriously, the natural spectrum lights really do help.
Eve’s last blog post..My First Blog Award
missy wiggins
that sucks ass! i too have hashimoto’s thyroiditis (the name even sucks!) and it took a few years to get things in check. my first doctor kept giving me brain scans instead of raising my medication dose and when i finally complained JUST enough, she referred me to a specialist who got things DONE! good luck with it all
missy wiggins’s last blog post..not your average monday.
Twitter: molassa
Christine
Oh, Buttercup, I wish I could make you feel better. Try to get out today, even just to go to the store and get that Vitamin E. Or just go crash Alli’s daily party
.
I’m hoping you get a Bloggy award; you know I voted for you.
Christine’s last blog post..Target disses bloggers…or Tar-jay and va-jay-jays
Jenty
I hope the Endo can help you! And that he’she gives you magic stuff to clear it all up.
Jenty’s last blog post..Bubble beards
Twitter: jenty
Anglophile Football Fanatic
I hope the endo gives you the strength, sanity, and help you surely deserve. I know mine did!
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..Break Out the Battering Rams!
Tasina
I tossed all my lighters when I quit the cigs, but if you’ll loan me a match I’ll be happy to join you (if you’re brining the ‘mallows, should I bring graham crackers and chocolate?). We can also burn up that silly bill they want to give you and all my bills from the big trip down the steps!!
Tasina’s last blog post..Braden’s Meme
witchypoo
The sunshine prescription? Only 20 minutes a day. What a person needs to stay sane in winter is ugly boots. Waterproof and warm. They’re always ugly, but can get you out. A toboggan and a bunch of kids coasting helps. You can always laugh at them when they wipe out.
I love the full-sprectrum lights. Nowadays, you can just buy the bulb and screw it into your lamp. Far better than the old light boxes we geezers had to get.
I wish you had the option of universal health care that we do.
witchypoo’s last blog post..Great Social Networking Plugin
Penelope Anne
OKay Benadryl for the itching, Avon cracked heel Footworks lotion for the feet.
Pray that the endro can help.
I live in this hell daily.
And far too many things mock me ;o)
Penelope Anne’s last blog post..1 2 3 4 5…It Ain’t Monday!
Mackenzies Momma
Hey, i understand where you’re at- did i mention i finally got my doc to give me a referal to the endocrinologist? I suggest that maybe you call your endo’s office and speak to the billing department and see if they can work out a payment plan with you(most can).
Try and get out even if its just to go to the grocery store or whatever it makes you feel semi human again.
Mackenzies Momma’s last blog post..M…m…Mondays
Mackenzies Momma
OH! I almost forgot if you need a laugh (and want to feel less dysfuntional) you should track down a copy of the movie “A Dog’s Breakfast” there are links to it on my blog, go check out the trailers its really really really funny and will make you feel ‘normal’
Mackenzies Momma’s last blog post..M…m…Mondays
Rhonda
Dude, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize it was so bad. Are you on meds that cause you to have these problems? Gosh, hang in there. I’m sending positive karma your way as we type. And, thx for the invite. I love marshmallows.
p.s. Now, come by when you have a chance. I have bling. I just know it will make everything better.
Rhonda’s last blog post..Paying it Forward
Ree
{{{hugs honey}}}
I know that itchy feeling. Psoriasis here…..and have been known to scar myself with the scratching. it’s no fun.
and good luck on the bloggies! I can’t wait to see the finalists.
Ree’s last blog post..The Contest: Travel Hell – Sometimes Getting There Sucks
Lisa Milton
I would say movement in the sunshine if it wasn’t so dang cold. Is it cold there? Did you say that already? Oh please forgive.
May Mrs. Dr. Lady give you meds and peace of mind.
{January is tough. You are not alone.}
Amanda
Awww, I’m sorry you’re feeling down! I know what it’s like to have the SAME ARGUMENTS constantly. Aaron and I feel that we’ve spent 4 years of marriage at each other’s throats. It’s usually about money, or needing help with Neilen and household chores, needing attention, feeling underappreciated. Normal stuff.
But to us, our problems are the worst in the world.
I’m sure your condition makes it THAT much harder to deal with the stress. Won’t the doctor’s office allow you to make payment arrangements?
I hope the visit comes by quickly, and that they do something to make you feel better!
Jenni
I just read an article in the Washington Post about Morgellons skin “disease”. Pretty weird, those psychos er..people. If you start finding red and blue fibers on your skin or bugs crawling out of your scalp, you could join their ranks.
Jenni’s last blog post..God Had To Be Smiling
Redneck Mommy
Your feet look like mine…and mine are covered with patches of eczema. Sexy.
Hope your appointment goes well, darlin’.
And that muffin top picture? BEST DAMN PHOTO EVAH!!!!!
Redneck Mommy’s last blog post..Surrounded by Pricks
Twitter: talesfromtyahoo.ca
jill
try a humidifier and lotion.. and cooler showers.. i hope it goes better once you see the doctor.
jill’s last blog post..Organ Donation for All
feener
argh. sorry you are feeling this way. you have such a good sense of humor, i hope that helps you get through the days.
i too have rashes forming on my body. itchy everywhere. what are yours from ? do you know ?
feener’s last blog post..Guilt
Solomon Broad
Hi there. You are the lucky recipient of the You Made My Day Award. Congratulations. You may pass this award on to 10 other bloggers who make your day.
Solomon Broad’s last blog post..The “You Made My Day” Awards
janet
you seem to have gotten all the advice you can possibly use here. i have none to add, but i’d love to join in for the s’mores.
i do have marshmallows left over from the ski trip! will that do?
janet’s last blog post..Workout update
Twitter: planetofjanet
regina
Good luck at your appointment, I’ll bring some extra lighter fluid!
regina’s last blog post..The Blog Of The Week!
A Jill of All Trades
OMG, I fucking itch like hell like that in the winter, too!!!! Last night, my shins/lower legs were itching so bad I scratched them. This morning when I showered, the water burned them. The WATER!!! I now have little red blood dots below the skin. My arms near my elbows feel like they’re covered in poison ivy and itch like it, too.
Today I put some Japanese Cherry Blossom body cream on my legs after showering and they are just now getting tingly. Of course, that lotion smells like my grandparents.
Which is worse??
A Jill of All Trades’s last blog post..Oh the joy!
Tanya
my partner Nathan has itchies, except his have progressed into scabs. the funny thing is, I’m starting to get it too. Sometimes you are allergic to something in your soap, washing powder, fabric softener etc even food. We have got all ‘sensitive’ products now and mine has slowed down a bit. If Nathan didn’t scratch so much, his would too.
Maybe look into it?
Tanya’s last blog post..ten things
zoe
i’ll meet ya in the yard. i’ll bring the keg. i think we could both use a few.
zoe’s last blog post..Up your nose with craft supplies
HRH
taking a picture of your insurance exceptions would have been even more frightening then the skin pic. Hang in there, I am rooting for you and will bring chocolate and graham crackers any distance for a good bonfire.
HRH’s last blog post..A letter pleading for mercy…
Eve
I keep one jar of cream in the bathroom and one in the living room either near “my chair” or on the desk. That way if I start to itch, I just rub some in. I use it everywhere from my face to my toesies.
I haven’t had any s’mores in donkeys’ years. I’ll be there with Hershey bars and exercise tapes (I told you I’m old – no DVD’s here) in hand. I even have nifty fire-starter stuff that I use in the fireplace to get the blaze going quickly.
Eve’s last blog post..My First Blog Award
river
I forgot to tell you about my favourite moisturiser. Palmers Cocoa Butter Formula with vitamin E moisturising body oil. Slather it all over while your skin is still warm from your shower, it absorbs quickly, you feel silky, and you smell like chocolate. I hope you can get it over there. Plain sorbolene lotion is also good. Cooler showers also help as the skin doesn’t dry out so much. Natural vegetable oil soaps are also great, from your health shop. Are there any foods that trigger the itching? I have rosacea (which doesn’t itch, but is unsightly) and I’ve found that several foods trigger a red flush as well as direct sunshine. My personal triggers are chocolate, coffee, (minimal amounts are okay), curry and chilli. For the sun, I use a 30+ sunscreen all year round. Please forget Eve’s suggestion of a tanning salon. (sorry Eve). Just recently over here a girl died from skin cancer that she got from tanning in a solarium.
Autumn Dahlia
Burn baby, BURN!
I’m actually getting tested for that in a few weeks… apparently they don’t see my slothism as an urgency. May we be nutso together?
Autumn Dahlia’s last blog post..Yum Yum Gimme Some
Momo Fali
I’ll be there with my Kathy Smith tapes. You should hear the names I call her when I’m completely breathless and she’s saying things like, “I’m starting to feel it”.
Hang in there. I wish you well.
Momo Fali’s last blog post..Ho Hum, It’s Only A Seizure
Twitter: momofali
Jenski
K, so I’m just slowly catching up on blogs I’ve infrequently visited (no offense!). Just wanted to let you know I understand the whole frustration with the thyroid thing, as I had mine out almost a year ago. A lot of endocrinologists are all worried about diabetes. Not that diabetes isn’t something to worry about, it’s just that there are other equally worrisome endocrine issues that get less attention. Plus pregnancy can mess with your thyroid, as my friend has been on replacement TH since her son was born. (Ever wonder if postpartum hypothyroidism has to do with partpartum depression??) Anyhoo. Thought I’d add my two cents of support and sympathy and I’ll catch up on more of your blog soon. And vote for the whole Best New Blog thing, of course.
Jenski’s last blog post..Sometimes, I’m a stereotypical man.
» Seeing Clearly.
[...] So, I did the thing that generally makes me feel happier, no matter what else is going on: I kicked the dog put on my jacket, grabbed my camera, and went for a walk. Movement in Sunshine. [...]
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Alian
My foot looks exactly the same!! Do you know what it is? How did you get rid of it???
Edinburgh Lover
Interesting that you’re talking about itchy skin in context with marshmallows. The itchy skin might be due to a high trigliceride count, or too much sugar in your body. Possibly cutting back on sugar intake and drinking more water will take care of this.
Good luck.
Robert Ahmed
Eczema is really so itchy and i cant help but scratch it. Corticosteroid is a heaven sent because it can relieve the itchiness and redness. “