Because Monsters are assholes.

The anniversary yesterday was lovely, and I thank you all for your lovely words and wishes on the post.

The only crappy thing about the past couple of days is that I’m having a wicked arthritis flare-up, my upper back and neck are a mess of pain (don’t make me turn my head or I’ll hate you forever, plus or minus 3 days), and my left knee has a possible torn/degraded meniscus with edema (water buildup and swelling) that prevents me from bending it much at all. YAY!

My advice to you is:

DON’T GET OLD.

Really. Stop aging right now! Yes, you there! STOP IT! It’s NOT good.

While I’m on the mend, this little girl makes me happy. I have watched her video about eleventy-million times in the past couple of months, and I ALWAYS laugh.

What’s the funniest thing you’ve seen/heard a little kid (yours or someone else’s) do/say?

arthritis, back pain, funny, Kick His Ass, Kids, kill me now, little girl, Monsters are assholes, pain, torn meniscus, Video

This entry was posted on March 29, 2008, 11:42 AM and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through RSS 2.0. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

#1 by Law Student Hot Mama on March 29, 2008 - 11:55 AM

My favorite part of that video is the mom who clearly doesn’t know how to react . . . should she laugh? Should she tell her kid not to say that word? Should she impotently stand there with a video camera?

I once heard a toddler try to say “truck” . . . it came out as a different word that starts with an “f” and rhymes . . . It was awesome.

Law Student Hot Mama’s last blog post..Pregnancy RE-Revisited

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#2 by Just Jinny on March 29, 2008 - 12:09 PM

My nephew, Mack, says and does stuff every single time I see him that cracks me up.

He talks about his imaginary book of rules and sings songs he makes up..usually ending them with being on one knee and a fist to his forehead..very dramatic. He takes pictures of his dogs ‘nuggets’ and when we asked him WHY he would do that, he says ‘Because it’s hilarious!’.

I could go on…every day it’s something else with him.

Just Jinny’s last blog post..Photo Hunt: High

#3 by missy wiggins on March 29, 2008 - 12:13 PM

i can’t even think of one to say because my daughter says something hilarious on a daily basis. today she asked if jesus bought our cat. thankfully anything embarrassing she says is usually said at home and not in public.

oh and since you asked me to i am now going to stop aging.

missy wiggins’s last blog post..Work.

#4 by AmyM on March 29, 2008 - 12:16 PM

My friend K has the funniest embarrassing kid story I’d ever heard…

K was talking to another woman in the hallway after church. Her daughter Aub (then 3) was impatient and wanted to leave. She kept pulling on K, and saying “I wanna go now!”. K told her they’d leave when she was done talking, but she wasn’t moving fast enough for Aub. She looked up at K and with complete seriousness said: “Mom, I’m going to give you 2 more seconds… and then I’m gonna beat your ass.”

I’da died…

AmyM’s last blog post..Afraid to move

#5 by Robyn on March 29, 2008 - 12:21 PM

Oh that’s great. Needed that laugh. Thank you

Robyn’s last blog post..march twenty-eight :: 31 days :: day twenty-eight :: 15 months

#6 by AnnD on March 29, 2008 - 12:22 PM

I love that video. I’m a psychotherapist and I see a 2 year old girl and my co-worker sees her mother. Well, after our sessions were over, the mom (being 8 months pregnant) was struggling to get her the 2 y.o. into her winter jacket and my co-worker (mom’s therapist) stepped in to help. I sat back and watched so as to not hurt the rapport between myself and the girl. After an intense struggle, the little girl looked up at my co-worker and shouted: “I’m gonna whoop yo’ ass!” I cracked up!!!!! I couldn’t help it! It was so random and she was as serious as a heart attack! I loved it! I’ll be 98 years old and still remember that moment.

AnnD’s last blog post..Photo Hunters!

#7 by Ree on March 29, 2008 - 12:27 PM

Ohhhhhhh. I get it. I should say kick his butt.

Excellent!

Ree’s last blog post..This Is For

#8 by Mackenzie's Momma on March 29, 2008 - 12:31 PM

OMG, i think i found a new favorite You tube video!

#9 by Courtney on March 29, 2008 - 12:32 PM

Oh my gosh, AmyM, that is seriously one of the funniest things ever! And to happen at church, nonetheless! Kids sure pick up on every little thing, don’t they?!

I don’t have any funny things my DD has said b/c she’s only 15 months and her vocabulary mostly consists of Daddy, Dog, Duck, etc. Although for a while she was saying something that sounded very much like a drawn out version of shit. Kinda like shheeet.

Anyhow, I wanted to link to this you tube video DH and I found when looking for laughing babies. I about pee my pants every time I see it! I’m not sure if the laughing is the funniest part, or the part where the kid keeps conking his head on stuff when he’s falling over from laughing so hard. Hope this link works…

http://youtube.com/watch?v=cXXm696UbKY

Courtney’s last blog post..Cake: It’s What’s For Dinner

#10 by Lunasea on March 29, 2008 - 12:49 PM

Well, personally, I love my 4-year-old’s rendition of “Hark the Herald Angels Sing.” He includes the phrases, “Join your friends, and friends in style,” and ” boring to the newborn king” and of course, “Join the follies! H is wild! Join the follies! H is wild!”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L7OMw7n20iA

(it’s short, I promise)

Lunasea’s last blog post..Ya Gotta Reach for the Stars, or Something Like That

#11 by Gabriel on March 29, 2008 - 12:51 PM

Here’s a clip of my daughter singing who knows what last.

This is a ‘world premiere’, because I have the post written already, but it’s not coming out until tomorrow after the Weekly winners!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-zjVqYC-u4

Hope you like it!

Gabriel’s last blog post..Tonight, I became a man

#12 by anne on March 29, 2008 - 12:58 PM

I love that clip!

One of my best friends has a daughter, now 3, who around 2 years old went on one of many trips to Toys R Us to pick out a stuffed animal. They saw a stuffed octopus, and her grandmother said, “Look, Sarah! An octopus! Can you say, ‘octopus’?” And Sarah, very proudly and loudly, says, “Apple piss.” Clear as a bell. Apple piss. Cracked mom and grandma up so much that they couldn’t pass up buying the stuffed octopus after that!

Also, here’s one of my favorite kid youtube videos – still makes me giggle even after watching it for the thousandth time:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fVDGu82FeQ

anne’s last blog post..senora crankypants offers amends for her foo

#13 by Rebecca on March 29, 2008 - 1:09 PM

A friend’s third child was a girl, after having two boys. (Firstborn was 3 1/2 when Baby Girl was born.) Firstborn, while watching Mom change a diaper, asked Mom how Baby Girl peed. Mom told Firstborn that boys have a penis and girls have a vagina, blah, blah, blah. Firstborn was glad to know how Baby Girl peed and went on his way. On a subsequent diaper change (I believe the same day) Firstborn, while Mom was changing another diaper, said, “Mom, Baby Girl has the cutest vagina.”

Favorite. Story. Ever. About Friend’s Firstborn.

Rebecca’s last blog post..Photo Hunt: High

#14 by Jenty on March 29, 2008 - 1:43 PM

LMAO! Cute kid!

Jenty’s last blog post..This year is flying

#15 by Andie Summerkiss on March 29, 2008 - 2:07 PM

Just want to say Happy Anniversary! You are right, never ever get old … but how ? It just kinda … done. Oh well ….

Andie Summerkiss’s last blog post..International Treat of North Sumatra Fair 2008

#16 by Makeshift Mama on March 29, 2008 - 3:35 PM

Ok I just watched that like 20 times – too funny! I love the way her little arms go up when she explains that “If he gonna come in here, he’s a gonna kick MY ass!”

My two-year-old has gotten to the point where she says hilarious things every day now. Today I told her I was too tired to do something with her, and she said, “Mommy make coffee?” The other day I told her I was hungry, and she said “Mommy make chicken and make muffins?” Mmmm… chicken and muffins – what a delicious breakfast…?

The other day, she told me I had nice boobs.

Makeshift Mama’s last blog post..Saving Money on Prescription Drugs (You can, too!)

#17 by Jerinda on March 29, 2008 - 3:43 PM

My funny story just happened the other day. My 6 year old woke up and his voice was raspy. He asked why he sounded funny, and I said he was just hoarse. He said, “Horse, like the animal??” I said no, it’s just a word to describe the way he sounded. He looked puzzled for a minute and finally replied, “Nay.” LOL

Jerinda’s last blog post..Shopping!

#18 by Just Powers on March 29, 2008 - 8:08 PM

I just saw this video for the first time the other day. It has 12 million views, so no doubt you have already seen it, several times, but just in case. I watched it four times and started crying I was laughing so hard.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXXm696UbKY

Just Powers’s last blog post..Flip video

#19 by tommie on March 29, 2008 - 8:57 PM

very cute…..I had to show my husband why I was laughing so much.

tommie’s last blog post..photohunt: high

#20 by Ashley on March 29, 2008 - 9:01 PM

Oh! I’ve seen that! Haha! Cute video. Hope you feel better!

Ashley’s last blog post..Thursday 13

#21 by Secret Agent Mama on March 29, 2008 - 9:56 PM

Uhm, I just watched that video 15 times!

SO. Funny.

Sorry you’re in pain, dear. xxoo (gentle ones)

Secret Agent Mama’s last blog post..Project 365 (219/365)

#22 by Hockeyman on March 29, 2008 - 9:58 PM

The reason was for a boo boo, not because she saw someone wearing a NY Rangers or NY Yankees shirt…

I have a damn boo boo

Hockeyman’s last blog post..Water Park

#23 by Kelly on March 29, 2008 - 10:49 PM

That is FUNNY! OK, seriously?I have the most inappropriate child on the face of the planet. There was the time he told his preschool teacher (after she put him in a time-out) “You’re going DOWN, Mrs. Whatsyerface!” (Not really her name, I swear). Or the time he told my Mother in Law (after she told him NO) ” You wanna piece of ME, Punk?” But my personal favorite was when he walked into preschool and (again Mrs. Whatsyerface) told his teacher, “Hey, Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me??” The best part? It’s a Christian preschool.

Kelly’s last blog post..100 Questions answered

#24 by Hecticmom Undone on March 29, 2008 - 10:57 PM

One of my “super-awesome dad” co-workers had taken his 2.5 year old daughter to a movie and she had to go to the bathroom – she was just getting into using the potty outside of the house. The bathroom was pretty full and he took her into a stall.

He was putting the paper seat cover on the toilet seat and she started freaking out because he was touching the toilet seat. She started yelling, “Don’t Touch Daddy!!!! Don’t TOUCH!!!”

*LAUGH* I still laugh just thinking about embarrasing that must have been.

Hecticmom Undone’s last blog post..Customer Support

#25 by Kelly on March 29, 2008 - 11:05 PM

Thanks for this post, BTW…I knew I wanted to blog about those funny stories that I hadn’t thought about in a while, and NOW I just did!!

Kelly’s last blog post..I should probably document these things…

#26 by Taz on March 29, 2008 - 11:54 PM

hehe..

that is cute..

glad to hear you and john had a nice day..

just of the top of my head i cant think of any funny things..

Taz’s last blog post..i just couldnt help myself..

#27 by river on March 30, 2008 - 1:18 AM

Don’t get old? Okay, I’ll stop that right now. From my next birthday I’ll start subtracting instead of adding a year……….
I know just how you feel with the arthritis neck and back, I occasionally have days, maybe twice a year, when holding myself upright is too painful. Most of the time i’m okay though. I have permanent pain in my neck but I’m used to it. Heat pads help but you kinda have to stay still to keep them on. Not really an option with a small boy around.

#28 by Becky on March 30, 2008 - 2:41 AM

Funny kids…just what you need when life kicks you in the hiney. My son said to me this morning when I was changing his baby brother’s diaper; “Awww! Look at his cute butt Mom. I’m gonna take a picture and put it on the internet. OK?”

I was laughing so hard I couldn’t breath. I was tempted to show him some of your little guy’s butt shots and explain that his little brother’s butt wasn’t up to internet standards.

Becky’s last blog post..American Idol MeMe

#29 by Veronica on March 30, 2008 - 4:58 AM

No arthritis! BAD arthritis. STOP making Lotus hurt.

Amy says shit. Alot. I tell everyone she is asking them to sit down. I hope she is asking them to sit down.

Veronica’s last blog post..Dear Amy,

#30 by Jenski on March 30, 2008 - 8:27 AM

I love that little girl in the video! The other great thing to do is just look up baby laughing on youtube. You get all sorts of amazingly cute clips.

Jenski’s last blog post..Once a year

#31 by Karen MEG on March 30, 2008 - 9:10 AM

Lotus, you’re right, getting old SUX!!! But I’m fighting it, hard and fast. That’s why my butt, hips and back are killing me today after a hip hop aerobic dance class where I shoulda known better.

Hope your arthritis stops with this drama. Feel better soon, kay?

Just today Giselle laughed when her daddy hit the leg of the table. Said “that’s so silly Daddy, why do tables have legs, they don’t walk!”. Hey, I’ll have to make a post of that one LOL!

Happy weekend sweetie.

Karen MEG’s last blog post..Weekly Winners #17

#32 by cyndy on March 30, 2008 - 11:46 AM

I love that video, especially how she says “ohhh…” at the end, so innocently, as if she had no idea she should be saying butt. Too cute!
My best friend taught her DD to say the word ‘tutu’ instead of vagina. (I know, she’s weird) It worked out fine until she started ballet classes and teacher informed them that they’d be dancing in front of all the parents……in their TUTUs.

cyndy’s last blog post..On Birth, and 15 Years, and more…