Archive for category Uncategorized
BoobHer ‘08
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Uncategorized on July 23, 2008
As you all know, I really would have liked to have gone to San Fransisco last week to attend BlogHer 08.
Unfortunately, it was not in the cards.
But the same cannot be said for My BEWBS.
Redneck Mommy assured me that The Rack had a fabulous time!
Witness the photographic evidence of BoobHer ‘08…
BEWBS were honored to be lovingly held by Ninjas One and Two:

Thusly dubbed, because they were very sneaky and did not identify themselves. Lovely ladies who held my boobs and allowed it to be photographed! Please come forward and name thyselves!
(Update! Secret Identity of Ninja Two is Carissa of and so she blogs. Woot!)
Of course, the excitement did not end with meeting fabulous ninjas… It had just begun!
BEWBS were actually tried on!
Mamma Loves demonstrates proper placement:

MotherGooseMouse concurs with Mamma Loves’s form:

Assertagirl insists it is also important to hold them close for proper fit:

Kyla of The Journey thinks they need a twist:

Desperately Seeking Sanity’s Heather agrees quite a lot:

Note: The Rack does NOT cause gas. Just a disclaimer.
MotherBumper was feeling lonely, and decided to try the “Twist Placement”

See, The Rack instantly attracts beautiful women like
Mimi on the Breach! (and double fisting of beer!)

Velma, from A Smeddling Kiss, was thinking of trying on The Rack, but
she couldn’t stop giggling. What was she thinking about?

I think she told Slouching Mom her dirty thoughts:

This Random Airport Perv even
tried to get in on the BEWB action!

Back away from The Rack, Random Airport Perv!
The BEWBS are only for my BlogHer Hos!
Thankfully, Jess of Oh The Joys saved The BEWBS.
And compared them to her head.

Backpacking Dad is totally sniffing the left BEWB.
Dude, Boob Smelling?

Oh, wait… was he trying to kiss them?
Angella, of Dutch Blitz, shows him how it’s done!

That’s when things got really out of hand.
And the LICKING began.
MotherGooseMouse was not satisfied with her earlier pose.

Way to go, MGM!
Y, of Joy Unexpected was not to be outdone.

Lindsay, of Suburban Turmoil seemed to approve.
Of course, Queen of All Licks, Mrs. Flinger honored
The BEWBS with her illustrious tongue.

With that one lick, all degrees of separation between
BEWBS and all bloggers licked by Mrs. Flinger were
undone in one fell swoop.
SCORE!
Things were getting a bit hectic, so Redneck Mommy, Jen of One Plus Two,
and Jess rescued BEWBs and took them to a place where
they would feel right at home. Oh, yeah, baby.
A Naked Bath House.

Seriously.
Read Their Posts.
Whew!
After such an exciting time, there’s really no better way
to wind down than to hop into bed with the absolutely
adorable Casey, of Moosh In Indy.

AWWWWWWWWWWWWwwwwwwwwwwww.
Yes, folks, BEWBS had a FANTASTIT time in San Fransisco!
Only one problem. Now that The Rack is back home, it’s spending all its time hanging out with its new BoobHer Friends. Waaahhhhhh….
Free Stuff
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Uncategorized on July 20, 2008
Hey, just a quick announcement for all my lovely readers. I’m doing a giveaway site since I get emails about giving free stuff away to you guys periodically. Rather than choke this website with that stuff, or turn down the opportunity to give you free stuff, I started a sideblog for the giveaways.
First giveaway is up, so go check it out! Make me feel like it’s worth it by subscribing to the feed while you’re there, okay?
Get your bare ass off my coffee table. Thanks!
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Uncategorized on July 19, 2008
Braden figured out how to lock the little twist lock in the middle of the doorknobs. I nearly got locked outside Thursday morning while watering the plants. Luckily, the garage door was open and the entry door in the garage was unlocked still.
I left him watching a video. Was gone all of about 5 minutes. Another lesson in “Never turn your back on the toddler, you freaking moron.”
Little bugger climbed up and pulled the blinds shut after he locked the door.
Just what the hell do you think he was up to?
He had the “innocent puppy-dog” look on his face when I returned.
But that doesn’t much help when you’re sitting on the coffee table with your diaper off.
Toddlers. It’s like their brains are half “Evil Genius,” half “Drooling Moron.”
Then again, the Drooling Moron Act is probably just part of his Evil Genius.
I can’t decide if I should just always take my keys with me when I feed the dog or water the plants now, or if I should just put duct tape around Braden’s fingers. What do you think?




















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