Don’t take a pass on love.
- At April 29, 2008
- By Lotus Carroll
- In Uncategorized
56
It was August 2001.
I had been in Grad School for two years. In 1999, I arrived on the campus of Wake Forest University with a full scholarship and a fantastic, freaking gleam in my eye. Beaming with pride and excitement, I was ready to Get My Masters Degree On. Here I was, ready to start real research and studies in my chosen field!
Fastforward through 2 long years of huge disappointments and lows, both personal and professional, which I cannot even begin to describe to you in detail. Run on past the frustration of being forced to spend those years deep in research I had not wanted to conduct. Fastforward through years when I suffered my first bouts of serious Clinical Depression (my counselor sucked, btw) and skip over the night when my bathroom contained me, my full bathtub, a bottle of weakness, and a razor. Pass by the dissalusionment, betrayal, and building hopelessness in bloom.
By August of 2001 I had reached a point where I felt like a complete loser and failure. My thesis defense was textbook ugly. I went into it actually thinking I was on top of my game. Apparently, I was an idiot. They hated my work. My own professor did not back me up during the meeting. That is unheard of, frankly. My deadline had been extended. Extensive revisions loomed before me and an impending second thesis defense stood out there in the near future, mocking me with fears of a second failure.
And all of this? Wrapped up in a ball of research that I hadn’t been interested in conducting in the first place. So thanks a lot, asshats.
Grad School had definitely not been all I had hoped it would be. And this was the first time in my life that I could truly appreciate the term “burned out.”
That year, I was so very burned out.
And what did I do? You got it. I ran to the Internets to save me. “OOOOhhhhh, Internets! Please take me away from all of this!”
I was a Chatter. A Chat Rat. A Chatroom Addict. Classic Escapism.
Over months of avoiding my thesis revisions for large chunks of time, I forged oddly strong and special friendships with people all over the globe. Several of them I actually met in person, and it was really nice. Many of them I still have relationships with.
My boyfriend thought it was dumb. The Chatting. It was soooo lame and geekful.
Here’s the part where I could say lots of really mean things about him, but I’m not going to do it. Because that would overshadow all the nice things I could say about him but have no reason to say right now, and while our relationship was never perfect, there were really good times balancing out the really bad times. And there’s no reason to dwell too much on any of it anymore.
But, you know, he really was an asshat to me sometimes. Heh. (Obviously, I just couldn’t stop myself from pooping out a lil’ negative there, eh?)
By August 2001, I was a regular in a particular chatroom. I recognized other regulars and gave those I rarely talked to the standard greeting… those I spoke with often, I was rowdy and silly with. A good time was had by all. And when a jerk entered the room, a beat-down was administered by all. It was fun times.
Occasionally, a “bot” would enter the chatroom. Bots are basically programs designed to annoy the CRAP out of normal people, making them lose sanity and have homicidal rages. No? Just me? Bots often showed up and started spouting programmed messages like, “OMG, like, totally come see my naked web cam, hot-naked-shots! Click over to http://blahblahblahimaho.com now!”
You get the picture, right?
Well, one night one of the chatters programmed a bot and brought it into the room. Only this bot was funny. It was designed to go off when certain words were used – “potty-type” words. For example, if someone said, “BRB, I have to pee!” (happened often) the bot might quip, “Don’t forget to wipe!” HAR HAR HAR! *slaps knee*
At first, it just appeared to be a dorkus fellow chatter. But before long, it became apparent what was going on, and everyone kind of fell into a silly game of trying to come up with words that the bot would key in on, just to see what the response would be.
“Ass!”
“I heard your mom’s got a big one!”
“Poop!”
“Ew, what’s that smell?!”
“Fart!”
“Someone needs a butt-plug.”
And so on….
You can imagine the torrent of colorful words that started being Manually Blurted.
Apparently, the charm wore off rather quickly for most chatters.
But not for 2 of them. Two of them must really think Potty Mouth is funny.
Two of them kept throwing out more and more imaginative terms for the bot to chew on.
And when John finally typed, “Browneye?” I was cracking up too much to type any more of my own entries.
We’ve been best friends ever since.
And soon after, in September, I was single. Maybe I’ll talk about how that happened one day. Maybe not.
I was almost stupid enough to push John away, to hold him to just being a friend, thinking I needed time to “be my own person.”
But it’s silly to take a pass when love is up for grabs. And I’m glad I didn’t.
Besides, look how cute he was. I was doomed.
How did you meet your honey?
56 comments
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The Awesome
Connie
What a wonderful, fun story to read! When it’s real love, somehow you just KNOW it
Connie’s last blog post..THREE @ 4:09 PM
Joe
Ahhh. So romantic.
Nothing spells romance like browneye in a chatroom. LOL. Great story.
paloma
Great story. I posted mine up, too, and I really should get off the computer now, since it is my anniversary and all. Teehee.
paloma’s last blog post..How I Met My Honey
Gabriel
Great story, Lotus. Interesting, and fun at the same time. You can really write!
Gabriel’s last blog post..How I met my honey
Shannymar
I love these stories where us readers get to know you a little better. Some of us (hehe, me) jumped in to reading your blogs not too long ago and we missed out on a lot. Great story, who would have ever thought that the phrase “browneye” could bring two people together? ; )
Shannymar’s last blog post..Happy Birthday to me…
Taz
what a beautiful story.
maybe i should post how i met bjorn one day..
Taz’s last blog post..27 Weeks Old
Kelley
Awww… much better than mine. I was holding a chicks hair back while she vomited in the gutter.
I blogged about it back when I had like 3 readers, one of which was me.
http://www.magnetoboldtoo.com/2007/09/14/how-i-met-my-husband/
Kelley’s last blog post..…and then my brain imploded.
GoaldeeBug
I met my man in almost the same way! LOL
Chat room in Powwow back in 1997. I came into the room and threw myself into a friends lap, screamed for a marguerita and 4fthawaiian started flicking grapes at me.
It was love at first flick! LOL
GoaldeeBug’s last blog post..My Husband has a Lover…
Beth_C
Did you guys dance to “Browneye” Girl at your wedding? tee hee…
Marylin
aww what a sweet story
Marylin’s last blog post..And to lighten the mood…
Jenty
All mushy! What a lovely story!
Jenty’s last blog post..Frogs and snails and puppy dogs tails
Twitter: jenty
witchypoo
I remember those bots, and I never did stop trying to get them to respond. Good times..
witchypoo’s last blog post..This Week in Comments
Sue
Oh, so that’s how it happened! It’s always interesting seeing how people meet.
Hehehe.
Sue’s last blog post..The Mysterious RedHead
Lilacspecs
I’d been wondering how the hell “browneye” in a chat room would cause you to take enough interest to fall in love with someone. It’s so much clearer now, lol.
I met my man online too, but through an MMORPG.
Lilacspecs’s last blog post..Where Are You Going? Where Do You Go?
MP
I want more..if you were on the internets…how did you meet FTF?
How long did it take?
How far apart were you?
And yes, you were both adorable!!
MP’s last blog post..The new look
HRH
So sweet in a funny kinda way.
HRH’s last blog post..A Triumph of Motherhood…
Kitty
What a great story!! The end of my bachelors degree and shortly after graduation was a big letdown and I felt like all my dreams went down the toilet so I so relate!
Let Me Tell You About My Underwear | Baby Boomer Going Like Sixty
[...] (if you’ve done it, do it again!) The Chrysalis Stage CookieBitch Sarcastic Mom I’m done, I think this has been around quite abit. I looked thru my blog roll, even RSS and [...]
Ree
Aw. What a couple of cuties.
Ree’s last blog post..Food and Taxes
Lou Lohman
I don’t know what got you out of the bathtub alive, but whatever, or whoever, it was, we all owe a debt of gratitude. A BIG debt of gratitude.
Lou Lohman’s last blog post..on my mind, my feeble mind
Twitter: lceel
Kim
Awh… that was such a sweet story.. and boy do I remember those silly bots.. LOL
Kim’s last blog post..Pity Party is Over – Super Hero Saved the Day
Allison (aka AngelGal)
Sweet story. I met in a much more traditional way (like, face to face—-nothing else was really “traditional” about it.), so you can come take a look.
Thanks for reminding me I have to put this up. I wrote the majority of it like 2 weeks ago! Just doing some edits now
Allison (aka AngelGal)’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday #3 – First in 5 Years!
Sadie
Great story!! I love hearing how people met!!
Sadie’s last blog post..Myself Belts – Review and Giveaway!!!
Twitter: sadiecass
Karen
LOL! I met my DH on the ‘net too. I guess I should write up the story today. OK, OK, I will! But not until late this afternoon… I’ve got to start my job driving the “Mom Shuttle” all morning… save me!
Karen’s last blog post..The Secret To Getting Out Of Debt
Memarie Lane
You guys are so cute, I just want to squish you!
Memarie Lane’s last blog post..Some helpful diagrams for pregnant women
wright
That’s a great story! Who wouldn’t fall in love when poop is in the mix!
wright’s last blog post..Back To Our Regularly Scheduled Programming
Elaine
Looks like something wonderful came out of your difficult times. So, when did you actually meet in person?
Elaine’s last blog post..How I Met Their Father (a.k.a. The Love of My Life)
A Whole Lot of Nothing
He is a cutie. And I think you stole my hair from 7 years ago.
A Whole Lot of Nothing’s last blog post..Whatchawant?
Karen MEG
Awww, sweet story Lotus! You guys are SOOOOO cute together!
Karen MEG’s last blog post..How I Met My Honey …
Tootsie Farklepants
I met my honey at work. He was the boss. I’m such a cliche.
Tootsie Farklepants’s last blog post..Before You Know it I Won’t be Able to Tell if it’s My Husband or My Son on the Other End of the Phone
Angeline
awww…you two are perfect together!
Angeline’s last blog post..His first…
bits & pieces
How cute and funny! I’m happy to read a post with a silly side today, thanks for sharing!
bits & pieces’s last blog post..Tackle It Tuesday
Makenna
I love that story, its adorable! It made me smile!
kay
My favorite post ever. And I’ve been reading for a while. I especially liked like the line, “But it’s silly to take a pass when love is up for grabs.”
Also, I agree with Lou…big debt of gratitude.
And, what’s a browneye?
xoxo
In the Trenches of Mommyhood
The word “browneye” makes me giggle everytime.
In the Trenches of Mommyhood’s last blog post..Spillproof?
There’s More to the Story » Blog Archive » Wove, Twue Wove
[...] got the idea from Lotus, another awesome blogger, who got it from Reba, a blogger I now have to add to my RSS reader The [...]
Robyn
What a great story! Glad you decided to be more then friends….
I met my hubby at my church where we had a lot of mutual friends. We were best friends for a long time, and did stuff like paint ball fights, and water gun fights and campfires. Eventually we got together, and that was 13 years ago.
the planet of janet
that is sooo sweet — you met scatalogically!.
and look how cute you BOTH are!
the planet of janet’s last blog post..How I met my honey … Well, actually, more like how we got engaged
Twitter: planetofjanet
Eve
Brought together by bathroom humor? Now that’s something to tell your grandchildren. lol True love is always romantic, regardless of the circumstances. So, There!
Eve’s last blog post..Looking at the Snake
Kathryn
If it is true that a sense of humor can see you through bad times then you two are set! What a great story! I love reading all of these “how we met” stories. Yours is so original. I love it!
Kathryn’s last blog post..The Story Of Us
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas
Oh so cute. What a sweet picture of you guys at the end too! Awwww!
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas’s last blog post..Sparks Flew From His Fingertips
Twitter: amy2boys
ImpostorMom
awesome. The last two standing in the potty humor-a-thon
My husband was my boss at a goofy video store I worked at when I was a sophomore in college. He didn’t even want to hire me, but the assistant manager had already given me the job. He had some cute blond he wanted to hire. I showed him.
ImpostorMom’s last blog post..16 Months
imaginary binky
I’m glad I could be a part of the chats, part two. My friendships with you and the other lady are the best.
Good thing he didn’t show you his balls.
Heheh.
imaginary binky’s last blog post..Singing for our supper
Kay
I am the Kay that knows what a browneye is.
Sweet story and you two are so cute together, no wonder you make them purty youngins!!
Kay’s last blog post..Shhhh…everyone is asleep…..
Jennifer A
Oh man that was today???? Great story, I’m going to have to delay posting mine since I’m supposed to be at a meeting later.
Jennifer A’s last blog post..Things are changing around here
Maggie
Aw, that’s sweet. Browneye. Nice.
Maggie’s last blog post..The A Part of the Q & A Part One
Christie
Oooh, I hated those bots when I was a chatter and incidently met my husband in a chat room, ahhh, webtv’s rocked back in the day, lol
Christie’s last blog post..In health news…
Kat
Awesome!
I don’ t have time to write it all up for a good post, but I met mine online too, a very different story from yours, but still!!
You guys are so cute.
=)
Mary
Holy crap…!!!
I met my hubby..in a chat room…with use of a bot…LOL
He had just arrived in Iraq and I was lonely…lol…One night in a Vermont chat room, I saw this one poor fool trying to chat to bots…It was a really really lame one too… It was however, a very provocative bot who had a way with words….After watching him for a while, I private messaged him and said “Hey dumb ass…that’s a bot you know…its not real…it’s fake you putz!” He responded with “Damn….but they say all the right things!”
Three years later, here we are…buying a new lawn mower and eating cold pizza…ah, romance…LOL
Becky
Hmm! There are several parallels between your story and mine. School drama (I quit), boyfriend drama (he was a drunken loser), met a nice guy who lived out of state via an early form of the internets (intranet, really), we became good friends and chatted daily, then I met him in person and it was happily ever after. Sorta. Lots of other stuff happened, but that’s the essence. LOL
You can read it here, if you wanna:
http://ryanagi.blogspot.com/2004/09/foxy.html
and here is the next part:
http://ryanagi.blogspot.com/2004/09/stud.html
My family and friends were all dubious about me hooking up with a man I met on the computer. LOL And look at us now. We’ve been a couple since 1985.
Becky’s last blog post..Where do these people COME from?!
Claire in CA, USA
You are BOTH very cute! Y’all haven’t changed that much, frankly!
My story is sordid, and involves my best friend, who was also dh’s girlfriend. Uh, yeah, it’s like that.
Claire in CA, USA’s last blog post..A very interesting announcement
Tiff@Three Peas in a Pod
I met my hubby in a chat room too!!! We have been married four years this June and have two kids together!
Tiff@Three Peas in a Pod’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday
Candy
Interwebz luv! You has it!
That is awesomely cool. I too was once addicted to chat rooms, so much so that I became a host/moderator of a certain room and was paid by AOL for doing it. In hours ROFL. Because that was when you had to pay by the minute to chat, and I was always over my minutes.
Candy’s last blog post..No, it’s not a skin tag!
Rebecca
That is a lovely story. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Rebecca’s last blog post..Our second anniversary
Twitter: ramblingreba
Al_Pal
This is a great story. I laughed and cried. ;p
Twitter: Al_Pal
Dawn
I wish I would have written mine … dammit.
Dawn’s last blog post..I’m never watching “The Toy” again…