Kid doesn’t know how lucky he is.
- At January 21, 2009
- By Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom
- In Humor, My Son, Parenting
51
I mean, if >I< got to take a freakin’ nap every day, I’d be shooting SUNSHINE AND ROSES out of my butthole when I woke up.
And don’t even get me started on the pretty princesses, the unicorns, or the rainbows.
Or the tiny, sprightly, little elves with PINK TUTUS.
There would be a veritable fantasy fairytale world around my general anus area.
But this kid? OH HELL NO.
After-Nap time is also known as The Hour of Satan.
There is screaming, crying, flopping around… an all over protest at the very idea of existing takes place. Then, suddenly, it vanishes and Cute Boy arrives. Ready for his snack. But with a little Satanic Grump Angst tucked in on the side.
“I Got Your Photo Shoot Right Here, Lady”

Unfortunately for him, even his Satanic Grump Angst is so damn cute, I just laugh.
(And the effort sometimes forces a cute, glittery fairy wand out of my butt. Don’t tell.)





Heidi
Good God! He’s getting so freaking big. STOP GROWING!
Heidis last blog post..Just Fine
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Heidi,
Amen! Preach it, girlfriend!
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Tabitha
Holy crap, that kid is beyond adorable. I just can’t get over it.
Tabithas last blog post..Letter to My Heart
Amanda
Hey – I have his alter ego here – the Before Nap Grumblebum Boy (aka Prince of Scowl, aka Angry Man).
….and how cute is your boy??? (well i suppose you already know how cute he is).
… and subtly flipping the bird at the paparazzi at such a young age requires great skill
Amandas last blog post..That bloke that does the silly dance on the tele
river
I understand him perfectly. I am also a grump, make that GRUMP, when I wake up from a nap. For at least 20 minutes.
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@river,
Well, me too, in the morning. But no one else is allowed to be cranky. Just me. Hmph.
Twitter: LotusCarroll
kompostela
I just thought yesterday that I haven’t seen posts about Braden for long time and miss them very much:))
And today morning I started to read my reader from your blog and have nice surprise:)
My thoughts became meterial:))
heh:))
projectmommy
Holy crap. Did that kid turn five over night? His little cheeks are losing all their BABY CHUB!!! NOOOOO!!!
projectmommys last blog post..Ya put the www first.
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@projectmommy,
*sniff* I know, they are shrinking.
Twitter: LotusCarroll
SingleParentDad
You do all you can to please the little blighters, they get to take naps, live in a toddler hedonism, and still they get cranky.
Then do the cute as kittens thing, so we do it all over again tomorrow. Evil geniuses.
Super Nanny can kiss my ring – if she asks nicely, of course.
SingleParentDads last blog post..Only If You Say Please
Tanya
yes…so evil……lol!
Ashlie- Mommycosm
Oooo, that first picture, with the sippy cup…Yeah, he’s perfected the evil glare. Looks like he can shoot lasers out of his eyes.
My daughter tries that sometimes and I tell her I created that look, it doesn’t work on me, girlfriend. Usually makes her giggle and snap out of her funk.
Ashlie- Mommycosms last blog post..Brain guts
Ree
There he is, flippin’ off the camera again. He’s so going to be a blogger when he learns to type.
Rees last blog post..Grace in Small Things: 6/365
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Ree,
HAHAHA, Did you see my latest Flickr Photo of him?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/thelotuscarroll/3214944172/
Twitter: LotusCarroll
connie
Kiddies don’t realize how good they have it some times , do they? If I were able to take a nap every day, I’d just be ecstatic! Cute pics of Braden
connies last blog post..Long time, no blogging
Maggie's Mind
Hehehe, too cute! Yep, they are made extra cute for survival. True story. Lotus, I can’t believe how darn BIG Braden is getting. Seriously. He’s starting to look like a boy instead of a baby. Wow.
Maggie’s Minds last blog post..Hearts and Feet Revisited
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Maggie’s Mind,
I KNOW.
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Sarah @ TM2TS
I want to say that it gets easier, and that eventually it stops, but I’d prefer not to lie.
My son is almost 4, and nope, still becomes Mr. Ass after a nap. Now, though, he just shows it to the world, courtesy of him deciding that a half hour before it’s time to leave to pick up Sis’r from school is a good idea. Oye!
At least he’s cute and adorable when he’s being a butt. My son looks evil incarnate, in the way that you don’t even want to look at him for fear that looks really can kill.
Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]
Damn kids don’t know how lucky they are.
They’re fed, bathed, and forced to nap – not a better life I’ve known.
Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]s last blog post..Wordless 1.21.9: Sandbox
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing],
Seriously, he doesn’t even have to wipe his own ass!
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Anu
He’s cute even when he’s scowling! A rare trait.
Seriously though, my kid did this and it would terrify me. Then I figured out that he wakes up hungry, and so I would rush to greet him with a sippy cup of milk as soon as I heard those pissed-off sounds. Yes, that’s me. I’m scared of my own kid.
Anus last blog post..Another doozy from R…
Sarah
LOL – His grumpiness IS adorable!! I can see why you’d take a bunch of pictures of it!! *G* Heck, I used to take videos of Angel’s
Sarahs last blog post..I blame myself…
Twitter: sadiecass
Marylin
Awww so sweet!
Zack is the same, well… the very odd time he has a nap these days that is.
Marylins last blog post..Weekly Winners #3 for 2009
Momma Mary
Mine is the same way. SAME WAY! I pray for the days when he wakes up and decides to be happy or play for a few minutes before summoning me. Those happen about once a month if I’m lucky.
I feel for you!
Momma Marys last blog post..Inauguration Day
Anna Ellis
If we got William and Braden together… they could be angry all day long together. Haha. William gets mad, upset and makes me what to strangle him 1 hour before BED time. hmm… You think in an apartment they could hear him talking back to me if i shoved him into the closet?
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Anna Ellis,
No one hears anything if you put the duct tape on properly!
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Talina
Sounds like he is one of those that needs time to wake up. I know I have the hour of satin right after I wake up too… Coffee always helps me. Maybe he needs coffee?
Talinas last blog post..The world will not end over 1/2 inch of snow guys!!
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Talina,
You test out that theory on your baby, ok?
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Gabriel
LOL. He’s an angel (same as mom)…
Do you have anything against people wearing pink tutus? You know that’s a part of my past I would really like to put behind now…
Gabriels last blog post..WW#64 – Artist
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Gabriel,
As long as you’re not jumping out of my butt in it, you can wear all the pink tutus you want. LOL
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas
Another one for that middle finger panel I keep telling you to have framed.
Twitter: amy2boys
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas,
I know! I have totally got to do that one of these days.
Then I’ll send it to his Grandma on Daddy’s side. Think she’ll hang it on the wall with all the other family photos? *snicker*
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Colleen - Mommy Always Wins
Oh my God he’s such a little BOY!
My kids are all shades of evil on BOTH SIDES of their nap. Arrrgggghhh…
Colleen – Mommy Always Winss last blog post..Is this a sickness?
Twitter: mommy_wins
Maria
My son does that too! Even if he naps for three hours he wakes up like he’s been dragged out of candyland and into the pit of despair. Seriously, kid.
Marias last blog post..instant karma
Barbara
I can add my children to the growing list of those who don’t know how damn lucky they are. Your son looks just about cute enough to pull it off though!
Barbaras last blog post..21/365 – Young Photographer
Vicky (Secret Mom Thoughts)
My daughter was the same way when she took naps. She was unbearable for an hour after naptime. What worked for us was 15 minutes of Elmo’s world and a snack. I think it was a blood sugar issue along with toddlerness.
Vicky (Secret Mom Thoughts)s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Vicky (Secret Mom Thoughts),
His snack is literally waiting for him when he gets up. We’ve tried so many things. Suggesting or offering practically ANYTHING actually elevates the level of the screaming/fitting. The only thing that helps is just to hold him until he’s done, or until he wants down (and then he often just gets down and tantrums).
He just has to cry and moan and fit for his time, and then magically, the curtain lifts and he’s all better. Ready to eat, talk, laugh, play, watch tv, etc. But for that spell after the nap, WATCH.OUT.
Twitter: LotusCarroll
SECRET AGENT MAMA
Oh I so get this! Sooooooooooo get this!
Special K
I am now convinced…. I think you have a serial flipper on your hands!
Special Ks last blog post..WTF is Kizer?
Petra a.k.a. The Wise (Young) Mommy
I hear ya girlfriend! My little one has been REFUSING to nap so at about 4 o’clock she turns into the devil’s spawn and sends me halfway to the looney bin. Then right before bed she gets all snuggly and cute and I just want to eat her.
Toddlers and their multiple personalities!
Jill
I wonder how many hits ‘wand out of my butt’ is actually going to get you? also, I have a new site…
Please update your link if you have one to my new site. I got tired of doing two sites. I also need more hits to make sure I can continue blogging for spare bits of cash now and then, and I need the links for that, so…. if you please…
http://lilmouse.blogsite.org/
Jills last blog post..Fun Monday and A FUN ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
Lydia
WOW, i thought Satan only booked time in at my house… sometimes he books the whole afternoon and cancels nap time…
mah-meeee
oh… i totally know. my oldest is already 4 and still wakes up grumpy if not screaming from naps or any kind of ‘sleep’.
that child… some days i can just …. grrr!
if only i can nap, i’d be happy and not screaming.
mah-meeees last blog post..knee deep in vomit
Indigo
I can’t help but chuckle at the thought of what comes out of your butt when your happy. I used to say everyone else got to enjoy the angel that was my daughter, I lived with the devil’s offspring. (Hugs)Indigo
Indigos last blog post..Missing…Find Me..
Indigo
I can’t help but chuckle at the thought of what comes out of your butt when your happy. I used to say everyone else got to enjoy the angel that was my daughter, I lived with the devil’s offspring. (Hugs)Indigo
Jenny from Mommin' It Up!
Once again, Braden and my daughter Sophie are kindred spirits. She wakes up in a TERRIBLE mood! Me, I’d be all chocolate & cupcakes out of my anus. (oh wait. eww.)
xo!
Jenny from Mommin’ It Up!s last blog post..The Great Underthong Mystery of ‘09
Twitter: jennyitup
Jenny from Mommin' It Up!
P.S. I just got a spam porn-ish email from an Alfons Carroll. Any relation?
Jenny from Mommin’ It Up!s last blog post..The Great Underthong Mystery of ‘09
Twitter: jennyitup
Jennifer
That’s how I look when I wake up in the morning.
Jennifers last blog post..A significant day
Mommyknows
I know exactly how he feels! EXACTLY … I can’t nap and NOT feel homicidal. In order to stay off death row, I stay awake during the day. 2 of my 4 kids are the same. I cut out naps early on and went to a much earlier bed time. Either way they were miserable late in the afternoon, but at least without the nap they were in bed immediately after supper.
He’s cute
REALLY cute.
Mommyknowss last blog post..We’re Going Downhill –> FAST!
AnnD
I hear you on that one! I’m actually quite relieved the you wrote this because I thought MY two year old was the only toddler who acted like a raging butthead after she wakes up from her naps. She spends the first ten minutes after most of her naps laying on the floor, crying. I finally just leave her there. Apparently, she just has to do it.
jennielynn
I’m sort of digging the almost flip-off. It would make a kick-ass Christmas card.
jennielynns last blog post..Why I HATE AT&T. Rated PG-13