Lazy douche goes to Ultimate Blog Party, Nashville.
Have you heard of The Ultimate Blog Party by 5 Minutes for Mom?
Probably so, because you are all much smarter, more hip, and in the know than I.
I hadn’t heard about it until my lovely friend Mrs. Fussypants invited me to the physical version of one going on here in Nashville.
No offense to 5M4M, it’s just that I never know what the hell is going on anywhere until someone clues me in. I’m a super idiot spazz braindead moron cutting edge on-the-fly kinda girl like that.
That didn’t even make any sense. But let’s pretend like it did.
Point? I’m heading over to Malia‘s house Monday evening, where the Nashville Ultimate Blog Party is being held, to embarrass myself at yet another internet-related IRL Event. And I’m forcing my husband to come with me, because I heard there MIGHT be a LITTLE wine there and if there is? I get to have some. And that means he gets to drive.
Sarcastic Mom does not endorse drunk, buzzed, or tipsy driving.
Get thy drink on safely.
You know, what I really meant to say is that if he didn’t come with me, I’d miss him a lot and be miserable. Yeah, that’s it.
And I didn’t just correct myself for fear of losing frequent foot rubs and after-dinner dish cleanup by the hus.
And by the way, it’s also totally not just so he can babysit Braden while I blab and gab and act like a super doof.
Really. It’s not.
Our bond is thick and dear and we cannot bear to be apart for even short periods of time.
Yeah. You don’t even believe me, do you? You damn people have gotten too smart.
So, Monday night I get to leave the house in the evening (*gasp*), possibly have a drink, hang out with other bloggers (score) and listen to the lovely Leslie Mills perform.
I hear tell that we are supposed to be prepared to be interviewed, so I’ll be washing the bottom of my shoes on the off chance that I’ll be sticking one of my feet in my mouth.
You laughed when I said “off chance.” Seriously. Stop being so damn smart.
This post really was the dumbest way to virtually introduce myself to anyone visiting from the UBP, but hey, might as well make it clear from the get-go that I am clueless, moronic, lazy, irresponsible, and can’t be expected to follow rules.
By the way, apparently there are prizes to be won if you follow all the rules and post something/link in by March 27. Or something like that. I got a bit confused. I think you have to comment on at least 832 blogs to enter. What? I don’t remember, but it sounded cool. For people who have energy and are not Big Fat Lazy Douches.
Just give me my wine, and I will be okay.
19 comments
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Matthew Dryden
I’m a new commenter, so be especially gentle.
I have yet to attend an internet related party – but I can’t imagine it going so well…I’d probably run into someone I’ve never read, but knows my stuff pretty well..like: “Hey, I loved your last entry, it was hilarious!”
“Uh, thanks, I appreciate it!”
“What do you think of my stuff?
“Uh…very introspective.”
“What’s so introspective about fart jokes.”
Yeah…wine is a definite must.
Matthew Drydens last blog post..Who Killed Elizabeth Walker?
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@Matthew Dryden,
Hey, you really can’t get more introspective than talking about farts!
Introspective: given to examining own sensory and perceptual experiences.
See, you just need a Bullshitting 101 course, so you can BS your way out of any situation.
Or just carry around a box of wine with you.
Twitter: LotusCarroll
loveyh
Mmmm, whine. Or wine, either way, it’s good for you.
Where can I sign up to be a lazy douche? I think I meet al the requirements.
loveyhs last blog post..Still Wondering Why…
Sarcastic Mom, aka Lotus
@loveyh,
That’s the beauty of Lazy Douchedom. No forms to fill out, no one to notify. Just BE.
Twitter: LotusCarroll
Courtney@Chaosisus
LOL well welcome to the party! I have been reading your blog for awhile now so not really a new reader but hope you will have time to stop by and see me some time! Get your drink on!!!
Obnoxious SAHM
I love your blog. you my kind of funny! ha!
Obnoxious SAHMs last blog post..I’m playing Hookie!
Suzanne
Have fun, or have as much as you can until they take the wine away!
(practice for future blogging events, maybe? We can hope)
Suzannes last blog post..There’s a First Time For Everything
Miss Julie
Just dropping by from the party. Thanks for the giggle.
Without sarcasm hubby and I would never communicate- it is how we show love. Good to see there are others like us!
Party on!
Miss Julies last blog post..If there’s a party goin’ on, don’t bother knockin!
Lynette3boys
I like you already. Just stopped by from the UBP – looks like I’ll be back again and again – you’ve got a great sense of humor.
tara
this is why i’ve been visiting the not-so-family friend blogs on the UBP list.
ps. how’d you get hooked up with blogher sponsors, i soooo want to go, despite tix being sold out.
taras last blog post..GO NATURAL today at sephora
juanita
my son has been doing lan parties for years with his friends in HS/Col. I think that parties like this should be standard on the calendar of adult techys. But like you I don’t always know what is going on. How do I find them before I hear about how great they WERE.
juanitas last blog post..How do I manage in Twitter …Thus Far.
Baba
LOL! You are just too hilarious! Party hopping hippie grandma here in Colorado who is trying to restore an 1880 Victorian Stone farmhouse with hubby, which is taking forever. I am participating too so stop by for a visit.
Babas last blog post..Ultimate Blog Party Is Here
Chris
Work Lotus was fun. I can’t imagine how fun drunk Lotus would be. Lol.
Colleen - Mommy Always Wins
You know, I scoffed at the UBP thing at first, but wrote what I thought was a blow-off post cuz I had nothing else to say on Friday. DUDE – page hits and comments CRAZY STYLE. Don’t underestimate those crazy party hoppers!
Hope you git yer drink on!
Colleen – Mommy Always Winss last blog post..If you threw a party…and invited everyone you knew…
Twitter: mommy_wins
Milanese Masala
Hee hee! I like what I’m reading! Sarcasm is da best. I’m a Canadian blogger based in Italy. Come on over to my party when you get the chance!
Milanese Masalas last blog post..Festivus – Masala style!
Jessica Turner
you and your family are lovely. do you mind me saying that on here? I loved meeting you all last night.
Let’s do that coffee.
Jessica Turners last blog post..Look Where I’m Going Tonight!
Talina
Yep, I’ve been checking out blog party blogs these days… I need to win me some baby stuff since we are broke.
Oh and Nashville is a pretty fun place, I am jealous you live there! We had a blast over the weekend there.
Enjoy your wine and blog partying!
Talinas last blog post..Summertown & Nashville Tennessee weekend recap, fun times!
Al_Pal
I think you are way too adorable to be called a douche. Just sayin’.
Al_Pals last blog post..My new creative outlet: Bread Puddings!
Twitter: Al_Pal
Bill Bartmann
Excellent site, keep up the good work