Pajama People
- At January 15, 2009
- By Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom
- In Guest Post, Humor, Rant
35
Thankfully y’all are online and not in person and can’t see me sweating in my Hello Kitty pajamas (yes, sincerely) while I hammer out a guest post on a BIG blog like over here where dear Lotus has approximately 20 million subscribers (roughly the same as the population of Shanghai, you know, over in China and where their city with the most peeps happens to be).
I’ve got some stage fright going, but this is something that must be said. A public service good doing of sorts. And I’m helpful like that.
I don’t know when I was first witness to this exactly, but I’m sure my mouth dropped open while I stood staring (apparently I do that a lot, I’m told, but probably by liars) at the first all growed up adult person dressed in pajamas out in public, and now there are just so many more instances so much of the time. No, I don’t mean just while he wanders to his mailbox for a sec or when she pops out super quick just to get her newspaper (whatever old fangled bit of nostalgia an actual newspaper is – if it isn’t in my reader, it ain’t news or didn’t happen) – if it’s your driveway, it’s your ball of beeswax.
No, see, I mean that there are Pajama People in the grocery store dairy aisle. You’ve seen them, haven’t you? Or in produce over by the cabbage. Toy section and whatnot. Or over in the damn apparel section for crissake where they sell clothing that’s specifically NOT intended for those 7-8 hours that big folks are supposed to sleep (hmm, maybe that’s why I’m such a cranky puss? pass the coffee, wouldja? thanks, bitch.). The damn apparel section where they instead sell clothing for things like leaving your home and going public with your grown up self. All over the place anymore damn kids these days, I tell ya it seems there are Pajama People out and about, shopping like it ain’t no thing a’tall to be wearing fleece Snoopy pants, plus or minus the equivalent of Garfield slippers (not that there is any real equivalent).
I also don’t know exactly what the age limit should be on when you are too old to dress like a toddler in public, but I would assume it ends roughly somewhere around the age when toddlerhood ends. (And technically, most toddlers I see have moved beyond PJ’s, but we’ll go with it.) All you mamas help me out here – when does that toddler bit end? Whatever age that is, that’s what I pick. Everyone else in comfy J’s in public? In violation of a whole list of things sacred, like dignity or respect for self and others and a whole bunch of other… just other sacred things, okay?
Are we really that lazy as a society (here I mean any society using bedware as a weapon) that not all of us can bring ourselves to throw on some damn pants when we go out of the home? I’m not even asking that everyone brush his or her hairy-assed teeth (unless there is going to be smiling or talking close to my nose involved). No need to comb your sometimes sexy (but mysteriously sometimes not so very sexy) tousled bedhead hair on my account. If you don’t smell too very much like last night’s ass or like the 5th day armpit, it’s really not any of my business whether you bothered to put your funk in the tub, or did or didn’t do so with or without soap, but for the love of non-lazy-douchery (that’s for my girl, Lotus, who may or may not be a lazy douche but who is well loved by bunches and shouldn’t be called names), can you please just put on some daytime clothes?
It’s bad enough when it’s the women folk, but we are kind of cute enough sometimes to get away with a whole lot of silliness related to pajamas (ask my dear Tom), but when it’s the men wearing PJ’s at the store, it’s that much more ridiculous, even in the middle of the night at the 24 hour Super Target. Call me sexy or sexist or whatever sex word you want, but I’m a little old school on men acting a bit more like men than like girls. Think post-caveman beating women with clubs or whatever they did with those things, but pre-”way to damn sensitive and turned into some tough woman’s little bitch” and just somewhere in between all that mess of extremes. The grown men in pajamas in public thing kind of shreds any of the aura of “man,” or even just “adult” or of “someone who can be taken at all seriously.” It’s just really not a good thing, for anyone and especially for men.
Not that any of this is really my business, of course, because generally I really do believe in people doing what the hell they want without interference from my whiny assed opinions, even when I think it’s stupid and as long as it doesn’t harm me or mine, but I got nervous at what the future could hold when I saw this statistic:
A survey recently revealed that 25 percent of the population had family members who regularly wore nightclothes in public.
WTF? Seriously? 25%? Oh. My. We are all going to some kind of hell on a road paved with plaid flannel and Sponge Bob stretchy pants. Well, except that it was for Shanghai, you know, the one mentioned above with 20 million people, that Shanghai? Things are a little different there:
Because many homes do not have indoor plumbing, the daily walk to the bathhouse with a towel and a toothbrush in PJ’s is as much about comfort as it [is] about necessity.
They. Have. An. Ex. Cuse. (!) theyhaveanexcuse.
So, if you are whatever age the moms I’ve asked above decide still includes the range of “toddler age” or are in a situation where you do your bathing publicly and outside of the home (which I’m betting all of it on red – because I do love me some Roulette – that this is not the case with the folks I’m seeing over by the canned chili), then fine, you folks carry on with your fuzzy-slippered and pajama-bottomed selves, and I’ll smile and nod politely while you make your way to the bathhouse or wherever the hell to go hose off your stink, as long as you don’t go through the grocery store to get there. It’s all good. We’re cool.
The rest of you just puzzle the stuffing out of me, but it’s kind of nice to have an entertaining distraction at the store (especially since I always manage to pick the slowest line) by getting to see people look completely ridiculous, so, um, thanks for making life a little more fun? Rock on, Pajama People, you suck, and I love to not love you.
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When Maggie’s not scratching her head at people’s bedchamber clothing indiscretions, she writes at her website, Maggie’s Mind. Hop inside her head and look around… she’ll share her life, “piece by piece” and she might just let you stay for dinner. Lucky you.
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Texan Mama
You know how watching Supernanny makes you feel better? Like, “at least my litter of children don’t spit in my face and call me shit-head”?
Same with the Pajama people. I may go to 24-hour super wal-mart, with greasy ponytail and clothes that I wore to the gym 16 hours ago, but at least I look better than THEM. Not that I look like a princess, but standing in line behind red-cami-with-no-bra and tinkerbell-flannel-PJ-bottoms-with-fraying-thong-hanging-out-the-top, I look like a SUPERSTAR.
Texan Mamas last blog post..What Would You Do?
Twitter: texmama
Angel Smith
I see Pajama People. They’re everywhere.
Seriously, I will go out in jammies. But only if I don’t have to get out of the car. If I bring the Huz with me, it’s the perfect excuse to make him go in for me, heh.
Angel Smiths last blog post..Please don’t take my son-shine away.
Special K
I have been guilty of wearing pj bottoms and houseshoes at Walgreens at 3 a.m. due to a sick baby (or myself). Walgreens has a pj policy ya know? Just kiddin’ I can pretend can’t I?
As long as they have the essentials covered I am good. PJ pants cover many sins unlike, say, the daisy dukes. I could live without them wearing the spaghetti strap nightshirts sans bra though, that is crossing the line but then when does it? The summer clothes are the same exact thing.
Now I am up late and want to go to Walmart and see how many people are wearing pjs. Hee!
And when someone figures out why a girl can go into Walmart in a bikini top but not her bra without going to jail let me know. Ditto for men going shirtless at the beach with double D boobies.
connie
OMG! First of all, Maggie, you have *nothing* to worry about as far as guest posting~you are HILARIOUS & had me LOL the ENTIRE post! You did a fantastic job~great guest post
Secondly, (raises my hand)~I have been guilty of wearing my pj pants to our local town post office/local town pharmacy, but I don’t make a habit out of it. The only times I’ve ever done that is when either 1) I’m so sick I can barely move but have to go out or 2) one of my boys are sick. I’ve NEVER gone out in public like to WalMart in pj pants~I just save that for the locals, LOL! But, I also have to point out, when I have worn my pj pants (fleece pjs), I’ve worn a jacket over whatever shirt I was wearing so as to not look “too tacky” (if that’s possible, lol!).
Sometimes, if I’m in pj pants & just don’t want to get out at all, I’ll make my oldest son (13) run in & get the prescriptions/check our mail. Hey, gotta make him earn that allowance somehow
(just kidding!)
All kidding aside, my point is, I don’t make it a habit to go out in pj pants but if I do, it’s only to our local town post office/pharmacy & it’s only if I feel like death warmed over/am seriously PMSing
Great post Maggie
connies last blog post..Weekly Winners=January 4th-10th 2009
connie
I meant to add something to the next to the last paragraph of my “book” comment~I only do it if: I feel like death warmed over, I’m seriously PMSing, or one/both my boys (kiddies) are sick.
connies last blog post..Weekly Winners=January 4th-10th 2009
Zoeyjane
I was just talking to a girlfriend today, saying that if I had any pajama pants that weren’t too big and showed my crack, I’d totally go out in pj pants. If her 8 month old can do it, so can I
Zoeyjanes last blog post..On Frequency (and the inability to shut up, apparently)
Lilacspecs
Yesterday I went out in fleece excercise pants…and no underwear!
Muahahahahha.
No, really, I’m serious.
Lilacspecss last blog post..Pieces of Me
shadow
okay, i must be living in a strange world, or i just haven’t noticed, but i have yet to see pygamas in public. but you had me laughing here. this is GOOD. know what i can’t stand???? people without SHOES in shops!
shadows last blog post..dream on
Mad Woman
I’m a little afraid of the natural course that this Pajama People epidemic will take. Soon it will evolve into them not just wearing Spongebob flannels and tank tops but into feety pjs. And remember when it was “cool” for teenage girls to have those plastic pacifiers on their keychains and necklaces? Next time it’ll be baby bottles.
Seriously…if my 6 year can’t wear her pajamas out of the house without fear of retribution, what makes the 350 pound woman in front of me at the grocery store think that I won’t comment on it publicly?
But maybe I’m just outspoken or something.
By the way….you had nothing to worry about. You’re hilarious!
Mad Womans last blog post..Remarkable Powers of Restraint
pgoodness
I can get behind sweat pants or yoga pants, but the pj pants are just wrong!!
or maybe those people have the self-confidence and who cares attitude that I don’t…
(great guest post, btw)
pgoodnesss last blog post..Vacation in bullets
Twitter: Pgoodness
kompostela
I don’t have pajamas:) and I have’t seen anyone in pajamas here on public:)))
kompostelas last blog post..Weekly Winners January 4-10
AnnD
I am so totally there with you! I have never understood how people so calmly (and with confidence) venture out into public places wearing PJ pants and slippers! Honestly, I have a two year old and though I do take her out in sweatpants, any charcter-ridden flannel PJ pants would be removed before the journey! I wouldn’t even put my toddler in Sponge Bob pants and take her out to Target! No way! Let alone myself!
AnnDs last blog post..A HP birthday!
lceel
The ones I find gross are the women (mostly young women) that a) wear pajama bottoms in public and b) don’t wear underwear under the pajamas and c) have all of that wiggly junk in the trunk. That’s the abc’s of it for me. Of course, if you eliminate ‘C’, well, then it’s okay. Fine, actually.
lceels last blog post..One Lucky Guy – Not Me
Twitter: lceel
patois
Since I don’t wear pajamas, per se, I can get away with wearing my night clothes — Tshirt and sweats or yoga pants — in public. Yesterday, though, I spotted a woman at the grocery store at 11 a.m. in full pj-gear, including fuzzy slippers. I kind of envied her.
patoiss last blog post..One of These People Doesn’t Belong
Lynette
Okay. I’m laughing but hanging my head in shame beccause JUST LAST WEEK I was in the Target in my Paul Frank pajama pants. Do I get credit for wearing it with shoes and a tank top?? And I also washed my face/brushed my teeth??
I know. All of that I could have just threw on some sweats but I really REALLY didn’t want to. SIGH. I’m so freakin’ lazy.
Lynettes last blog post..Because all sense isn’t good sense…
momranoutscreaming
All I can say is thank goodness for yoga pants or I would probably be on of those pajama people. I have, on occasion, gone out in fleece pants that were technically pajama pants but I’ll call them lounge pants because I don’t wear them to bed and they don’t look sloppy. I can’t wait to go to the store today and count how many people are wearing pajamas. I haven’t really noticed any yet but it’s so frickin’ cold and snowy here that they would probably freeze their berries off if they did. If I find in excess of two, I’ll report back
Very Funny
Kellie
momranoutscreamings last blog post..Shhh…the S-E-X talk
MrsW
We’ve only recently graduated to 24 hours shopping so these pyjama peeps are not yet a local phenomenon – but where America leads we follow, and I expect if I hang around Tesco in the middle of the night long enough, and I keep very very still, I should soon be rewarded with the sight of some flabby Scotsman (probably in the pie section) not wearing very much at all because, despite the damp, real Scotsmen don’t even need underwear you know
)
MrsWs last blog post..Extortion and extreme skateboarding
SECRET AGENT MAMA
I had a “fight” with Mikey a while back. He was going to WM with my parents (when they were in town) and was in his camo pj pants. He didn’t want to go in them and we were like just go already, you are fine, and he was all no way i don’t want people to see me in my pj’s.. LOL
Now me, I’ve gone out in Pajama Pants and felt totally fine about it. But they are more like Yoga Pants, so .. there!
Jill
Okay, I will provide 2 exceptions to the rule. And an aside, in college, I saw TONS of people going to the store in their pjs. I really doubt they wore them to bed, I imagine they slept naked and then put them, wait, it’s not like I imagined it or anything, it’s just what I figure happens in college. Anyway, 2 exceptions, if you’re a guy getting ice cream for his pregnant wife or tylenol or cold medicine for your sick child, you get a break, after all, your life is hell enough right now. My husband? Would NEVER wear pjs out in public. Ever. It’s beneath him. But for those 2 things, I think most guys can be exempt. Ladies? If you’re SERIOUSLY pregnant, or gave birth less than 2 months ago, you also get a bye. Most likely you don’t fit into any of your clothes, even maternity clothes, so your yoga pants are your last shot at normalcy. Umm, I did wear what you could consider pjs for about 3 weeks after my baby was born. Then I felt like hell and got out all my other pants, determined to NOT go out in public like that. I felt so much better NOT being a pajama person. Although not having to change out of your pjs because its your third set that your baby has NOT pooped/thrown up or spit up on is okay. After 2 months, get a grip and put on your big girl pants!
Jills last blog post..Fun Monday and A FUN ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
Stassja
Wonderful guest post! I could never go out in MY jammies, I’d be arrested. Or at the very least lusted after.
In all seriousness, I remember during my brief stint in college a few years ago alot of the kids that lived on campus would go to their morning classes in PJs! I thought that was kind of disrespectful, but maybe I’m old fashioned. Part of me rejoices at the young ladies that didn’t feel the need to look FABulous every moment of the day in case a suitor was watching. But I also thought…how lazy can you get?
Even being homeschooled my mom made me get dressed before we started. Sheesh!
Stassjas last blog post..*froths at the mouth*
punk rock mom
24 hour super wal-marts!!? where?? where????
punk rock moms last blog post.."Stupid Mommy"
punk rock mom
i mean target!
punk rock moms last blog post.."Stupid Mommy"
Chris
Maggie, I love this side of you! I saw pj people in slippers at jury duty last week and it just floored me. Aghast I was!
Chriss last blog post..Whips and chains and all things black leather…
the planet of janet
no one — and i mean NO ONE — wants to see me in public in my sleepwear.
that’s all i’m saying. you can read between the lines.
although my teenage daughter believes with all her heart that pajama bottoms are appropriate school attire. she’s delusional.
the planet of janets last blog post..Stupid is as stupid does
Twitter: planetofjanet
Anna Ellis
I’m a guilty PJ person. When my son isn’t puking or running a high fever, I will wear normal clothes. If he is sick and i’m feeling like a big huge pile of poo I go to wally world in my pjs. =) Only a t-shirt, bra, sleep pants and panties. Lingerie? no thanks. Lol.
Jessica
I agree! The only time my kid has even went out in public with pj’s is a late night er trip or early morning plane ride. Oh and I personally have never worn my pj’s in public. Work out pants, but not pj’s.
julie
Wow. I disagree with pretty much everybody. I don’t have any problem with people wearing pjs out and about. I used to wear a pair of blue plaid flannel pants and a big comfy sweatshirt out shopping. If I am in a grocery store or Target or Costco, I don’t really see why anyone should get in a big sweat over what I am wearing, as long it’s covering what needs to be covered.
(I feel the same way about cell phones in stores, BTW. I don’t care how rude you think it is that I am talking to my sister while pawing through the produce. It’s the grocery store. I wouldn’t be talking to you if I wasn’t on the phone anyway.)
julies last blog post..2008 in Review. Part April. and the Daily Alaska.
julie
Oh, yeah, and even though I disagree, and if I am ever in Tulsa I will wear pj pants everywhere in the hopes of running into you, this was very funny, Maggie. Great guest post!!!
julies last blog post..2008 in Review. Part April. and the Daily Alaska.
Jenny
I am totally embarrassed to admit… today I went into my local Panera Bread wearing… bright orange cropped sweats with the word PINK stitched on the butt… at 8:30am… not even that early. I might also add that I’m 31- at least a decade older than most pajama-clad co-eds you see out and about.
divacowgirl
Sometimes when I walk the dog at 5:30 am, I do it in my Tinkerbell pajamas. But I do have a coat on and it’s dark outside.
I’m so embarrassed.
divacowgirls last blog post..Thursday Ten, The Science Edition
Twitter: divacowgirl
christieo
hilarious!! i see them people all the time at the airport but i give them a free pass because secretly i wish i were wearing pjs to make myself comfy on a terribly uncomfy flight. but that’s pretty much all i’ll give them a pass for. my son’s one and i took him out in public in his pj’s in the morning (in his defense i was quickly running an errand at the grocery and he was just going straight home and back to bed for morning naps) but even then i felt like a terrible mom letting him go out in public in his pj’s so i’d say that’s my limit unless it’s after 8pm and we’re headed home from somewhere and i want to make the sleeping in van-transfer to bed successfully and i was smart enough to have the foresight to have pj’s in the diaper bag.
christieos last blog post..Fat Ticker Friday
Robin
The only acceptable excuses for a man wearing pajamas in public are:
1 – its way too late/early to be dressed and the pregnant wife has woken him from a sound sleep and asked him to fetch her more Tums or some other specific food product required to resolve her immediate craving.
2- its way too late/early to be dressed and he is fetching diapers or some kind of medicine for his newborn.
Dr. Psychostat
Toddlerhood returns at about age 60, when one regains the divine right to do anything and go anywhere in PJs. An added bonus is that they fit loosely enough that they don’t pick up skid marks.
Holly
About 6 months ago, in Home Depot, we actually witnessed a guy in flannel pj’s, a big terry cloth robe – not tied up but flapping open mind you – and construction boots, in the checkout line with a big old cart of crap. I know I stood there with my jaw slack and eyes poppiing out of my head for a good minute and a half. He didn’t even look one bit phased when he caught me staring at him. Oh, and he hadn’t shaved in a good 3 days. Ugh.
Hollys last blog post..Excuses, excuses (or the real reason why I’m posting now)
Ali Quatam
btw, does any body have any cucumbar sandwhiches spare… they are a good source of vitamin C and little girls! yay