Recently one night I was on Twitter, telling people about how I was making Honey Oat Bread, and that I had just made Cinnamon Pumpkin bread.
(NOM NOM NOM FACEHOLE CRAMMING DELUXE NOM NOM)

And apparently, I was totally painting a picture of myself which is exceptionally inaccurate, because JenCaSea asked me if if I had a bread maker or if I was just that domestic.
And I had to laugh. And then snort. Choke on my spit. And then laugh some more.
Because, as I told her not long after… yes, I do have a bread maker, and NO I am not all that domestic: the reeking toilets, piles of dirty laundry, and sticky floors around here can attest to that. I just like bread, it appears.
I mean, I stay at home a lot, yes. I occupy the domicile.
But I occupy it in the manner of a Supah Slob. Ahhhh, yeah.
You know who helps? My husband and son.
And the dog.
See, we humans drop crumbs, lint, hair, food slime, and general filth.
Then the dog adorns it by spreading his little, tiny Chihuahua furs over it all. Like a million little eyebrow hairs of stink. He finishes it off by going outside, and then tracking dirt from the back yard lovingly into the house.
So we have crumby, linty, hairy, slimy, furry, dirt coated floors.
NICE.
I like to pretend it’s just not there. The filth, that is. Because my usual floor cleaning technique is broom and dust pan, then mop and bucket. Cause that’s nice and environmentally friendly.
Unfortunately, it’s not Lazy Slob Friendly.
Know what is? Swiffer.
Yep. Slap on a dry cleaning cloth for the dog hair, grime, and general filth. Instead of pushing the dirt around in piles with the broom, just let the MAGICAL SWIFFER PAD MAKE IT ALL BETTER.

Seriously. It’s magic. There is no other explanation. Yup. Do not attempt to talk me out of the existence of magic. (Just buy a Swiffer and shut up.)
If there isn’t magic, then how does all the crap on my floor go onto this MAGIC PAD?

Try not to gag. Trust me, the picture doesn’t even do it real justice. You are lucky.
When you’re done cleaning up the filth your family and ungrateful pet (what, just mine? cause, dude. he is.) have decorated the floor with, tackle the… sticky stuff.
I’m thinking week old pancake syrup splatters, dog drool, and random splurts of apple juice. YUM.
Swiffer Magic Reappears. Bad Floor go bye-bye. Well, Hello, Good, Pretty, Shiny Floor!
Really, it’s so easy. They are fast, tough, and easy to use. It’s perfect for the in-between cleanup that any mother or pet owner needs.
For the big jobs, the mega ones? I’m still going to keep my mop and bucket. I just believe in using those (at least 3 times a year). But the Swiffer (both dry and wet) is SUPER for the in-between stuff.
So instead of being a Supah Slob in-between my mop cleanings, I can go all the way clean with Swiffer. That’s right. No more half-assing for this momma. (My mother would be so proud. Do you know how many times she told me to stop half-assing things when I was a kid??? Not that I am traumatized or anything. *twitch*)
If you’d like to “go all the way clean with Swiffer,” Visit http://www.swiffer.com for more information and to save $2 on any one Swiffer® Sweeper Starter Kit!
My husband and son will probably be weirded out that the floors are all clean so much more often now. They are going to start expecting me to bathe regularly and clean the toilets.
That’ll be the day.
What’s your cleaning must have accessory or super-fantastic cleaning secret?
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Compensated review commissioned by Blogher. For more reviews, visit here.
Tags: Household // 2 Comments »