Step two is crucial, really.

It wouldn’t be Christmas without this wonderful How-To from everyone’s favorite gifters.

There really is no occasion you can’t brighten with a dick in a box. And really, it would be nicer than getting a pap smear for Christmas or Hanukkah, right?

Also available on YouTube.

Merry Christmas to you all. May you find love and joy (and maybe even some genitals wrapped in pretty bows) today and for the rest of this season.

Of Junk, and Boxes

I need a little break from my sorrow.  You do, too.

Time for a favorite amusement of mine around this time of the year. 
I think I might just post this Every.Single.Year.

Perfect gifting solution for today’s economy, right?

You’ve got less than a week now, fellahs.  So buy that box and get out yer scissors.

Merry Crotchmas

Keepin it light, so I’ll give you a brief tour of our Christmas with pictures.

A taste of Christmas Eve Activities.

An idea of how spoiled Braden is.

Breakfast.

Test Drive!

Fire Engine Siren Testing.

Tootsie Adoration Moment.

Taking a Break.

The Posse Ventures Outside.

After that, Momma’s trigger finger kind of went numb.

This was the best Christmas I can remember in a long, long time. Having a child really brings the magic back to the day. I think he had a lot of fun today. I know I sure did. He’s fast asleep and I look fondly at these pictures now. I hope your day was as great as ours was.

Oh, and John still has one more present to unwrap…

Merry Crotchmas!

Nice Guy vs. Crazy Crotch Lady

A few quick notes:

Picked up the bow for John’s Christmas present today.

To the woman who saw me “trying it on,” I am sorry you had to see that.  Also, I am sorry your kids saw that, too, because I am sure they asked you, “Why was that lady holding a bow up to her privates?”  And it’s not like you needed ONE MORE question to answer from the kids.

To the man who ran all the way from the register to where my quick walkin’ booty had gotten by then, thank you SO MUCH for bringing me the two bags of groceries that I paid for and almost completely lost.  You reminded me that there are still nice people in the world.  Rock on, Mr. Running With Bags Man. I love you.

That is all.

Then you put your junk in that box.

The current budget
here at the Carroll houshold
may result in this.

Suppose my version
will have to be something like
Cooch under a bow?

[Edited: Um, about the suggestions on putting my 'box in a box.'  I'm wondering how you put something concave into a box? *scratches head*  If you can do that, I'm scared of your vagina, yo.  I'm stickin' with the bow, ya'll.]

PS: A belated thanks to Bill Gathen for reminding me of this video last night.  Yes, Bill, you are the inspiration, the meaning, in my life. *chuckle*