Hi. Here I am, being depressing again.

Almost seven weeks
since it started; we’re still stuck.
Would now be twelve weeks.

We are still not sure
when we’ll want to try again.
Sooner or later?

Some days, I think, “NO.”
Other days, I think, “maybe?”
It is confusing.

Afraid to chance it.
What if it happens again?
So soon, I might break.

Then again, it seems
no matter the length between,
the pain won’t differ.

Also afraid to
wait too long… time rushes by,
thyroid gets worse. *sigh*

Mostly we still want
to wake up from the nightmare,
our baby still here.

So probably not
ready to try again yet.
But still, there’s longing.

Braden’s latest word
is “baaay-beeeee,” complete with sign.
God, please help me cope.