Posts Tagged road warrior
It’s Hereditary
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Uncategorized on December 12, 2007
I’ve mentioned before that Braden is a ham. He makes all kinds of odd and silly faces. I was wondering how he got that way.
I figured it out. It’s hereditary.
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He sits around in his underwear and watches tv, too.
All photos of John courtesy of Daneille Root 
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Tagged Like Gangbusters
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Humor, Links, Miscellaneous Blabbering on November 22, 2007
It’s Thanksgiving… are you sitting in front of the computer with your pants unbuttoned, trying not to fall asleep from Food Coma or are you still dreaming of Gorging To Come? I hope your guts are/will be overflowing with turkey and gravy and such. If you’re gassy, open a window, I don’t want you stinking the place up.
That’s my job.
To say I was tagged for the “7 Random Things About You” Meme would be an understatement. It would, in fact, be like saying that Britney Spears is just a lil’ bit skanky.
(When I wrote that, I thought, “She’s a lil’ bit Skank-try, she’s a lil’ bit Rock ‘n Whore.” I amuse myself greatly.)
I was lovingly tagged by:
Christine @ Sippy Cupys and Blackberries
Anitra @ I Love a Kiwi
MountainMama @ Careful What You Wish For
Michelle @ Creative Treasures
Suzanne @ Suzanne Says
Emily @ E Flo
Adena @ Mother Thoughts
Elissa @ Random Ramblings From E
Siri @ Siri’s Corner
Michelle @ Babbling and Mumbling From an Otherwise Cognitive Crafter
Dawn @ Alex Year One
Yolanda @ Callipygian Chronicle
Grand Weepers and Grim Reapers
Christi @ Blah Blah Blog
Alison @ RDH Mom
1. My hands and fingers peel when the seasons change. I am not making this up. I have NO IDEA WHY. But it always happens. Maybe there’s snake somewhere in my lineage.
2. I have an inverted uterus. It’s all flipped the wrong way inside me. Kinky!
3. English was not solely my first language. I spoke both Swiss-German and English when I began talking. A first sentence was, “Muetti hat ein kopf!” Translation? “Mommy has a head!” Newsflash: I’ve always been a moron.
4. I used to be a hopeless drunk. I gave up drinking for good in February 2007.
5. I have actually become so enraged that I punched myself in the head to avoid hitting anyone else. I’m a genius like that.
6. I believe in God, and I don’t think He minds the fact that I don’t pretend to be perfect.
7. I have a disgusting mole on my lower back that grows hair. It might even have a leg by now. I am going to have it removed and get a tatoo of a lotus flower, once I’ve had all my babies. Problem is, I don’t know how many babies I want anymore!
I was also tagged for a “5 Things” meme by Kelly @ Kellyology, so I’ll just tack those on here.
8. I’ve been missing my husband A LOT this month. He’s been gone “making the donuts” more than usual.
9. My home has been INSANELY dirty and disorganized lately. It’s seriously been worse than it has ever been, and this entire past week it has literally been making me feel sick. I can’t seem to find the energy to get it in gear and clean the mother up.
The thing that’s growing out of the pile of junk in my bedroom keeps making sexual innuendos at me, too, and I just don’t feel safe sleeping in there unless John’s home.
10. My face is quite asymmetrical. See?
11. I have seen a golf cart fly over a hill and down into a pond in the middle of the night. I have had to jump out of it before it completed the journey. I have rolled down the hill, watching the cart fly to its final destination. I have looked at the faces of the others, and laughed so hard I thought I would die. I have been ashamed and yet proud of this story.
12. My real first name is Lotus. It’s a flower. My real middle name is Siva. It’s a Hindu God. My real maiden name is Wuensch. It means “wish.” I am a candidate for “Most Freaking Hippy Name In The Universe.”
And to make this qualify for Thursday Thirteen! (I am so delighfully cunning!):
13. If you would love to read even more useless trivia relating to me, I actually did a Meme very similar to this one back on September 14. It was my very first “tag” event, actually. It’s a “10 Things” Meme, and it’s HERE.
And I’m going to risk pissing off the internet gods of the blogging world by *gasp* NOT TAGGING ANYONE (consider this your Thanksgiving present, likely suspects).
Besides, I have no idea if there is even anyone left who hasn’t done this one. This meme has run rampant through the blogging world during NowBlowSomeGoats kind of like stupidity and apathy does in the general population on any given day. What?
Happy Thanksgiving, my friends. Peace Out.
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Haiku Fridays!
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Haiku, Marriage, Poetry on October 13, 2007
I noticed a little too late for THIS Friday (it’s 1:59 am, Saturday. Yes, I should be sleeping.) that it’s Haiku Friday!
I love Haiku! I am going to participate in Haiku Fridays.
Here are a few for this time, more next time.
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I lie in his arms
The moment seems to fly by
I long for it now.
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Alone here I sit
Typing words to those unknown
And I know not why.
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Anxiously I wait
He will be here before long
Forever, it seems.
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Make Out Meme
Posted by Lotus, aka Sarcastic Mom in Uncategorized on October 9, 2007
Okay, first of all…
John: Someone else has suggested I do this. It’s an assignment. You may not use this as an excuse to spout off about Terry Hatcher or Rene Zellweger, or any other old or pasty tarts.
*Ahem*
My first ‘Meme’ on Sarcastic Mom!
I’ve been tagged by Dawn, who has been tagged, but is still working on hers….
[You should do this meme: http://toddleddredge.wordpress.com/2007/10/07/that-meme/ I'm tagged for it and won't get it done right away - so I'm tagging you in advance.] -dawn
(there’s my memetag. see, I’m learning the rules!)
“Ten Literary Characters I Would Totally Make Out With”
(If I Were Single and They Were Real, But I’m Not, Single I Mean, I am Real, But I’m Also Happily Married and Want to Stay That Way, So Maybe We Should Forget This….)
- Louis Creed, from Pet Sematary. Okay, see, I read Stephen King near religiously. And even when I read that book YEARSANDYEARS ago, I thought he was delicious. So naïve to evil, so determined, and dedicated to his family in unimaginably hideous, yet cavalier ways. I mean, he went through hell (almost literally) to bring back his son, and his wife, from death. That’s sexy.
- Probably because I was just thinking of him the other day, Ponyboy Curtis, from The Outsiders quickly comes to mind. I read this book, upon the urging of a good friend, when I was in the 8th grade. I felt sinful, sitting on the swing of our front porch in the late afternoon sun, wishing I could just kiss away all his sadness when I came to the part where he read the Frost poem. Gaaaahhhh….
- Captian Ahab from Moby Dick. One word: Obsession.
- I feel pretty trashy already, and this one will just make it WAY worse… but if I’m going to be honest, I have to mention Lestat from the Vampire Series by Anne Rice. I became incredibly obsessed with these books while I was in high school and college (yes, even before the movie). This guy is deliciously evil… and yet, his heart is tortured by his actions and his past… his very being. *sigh* I thought my mind was going to explode when I read Memnoch the Devil. I wanted to `boingyboingy` away all of Lestat’s pains. And then all of his not pains. And then anything in between.
- Schroeder in the Charlie Brown Comic Series (do comics count? Haha) Just to get him away from that damn piano, for once.
- From another high-school read, this one required, let’s go with Mercutio, in Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. Go ahead, roll your eyes. But look at this guy. There’s the mystery of not having gotten to really know him… and at the same time, just look at what you do know. Fiery, passionate, willing to die for his friend. I’m in. Of course, you’re gonna have to get at him before Tybalt does. Damn you, Tybalt!
- Hopping back over to King again, I’m going to go for the gritty with Roland Deschain of The Dark Tower Series. This character… well, he could bend a car in half with his teeth while juggling flaming bottles of vodka with his penis, standing barefoot on razor blades. I’m convinced of it. You could drive an axe into his back and then pour acid in the wound, and he’d ask what was tickling his back. I’m going with him just for the Umph.
- People seem to overlook Samwise Gamgee of J.R.R Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings Trilogy. I think this pick is based on desire fueled by dreamy admiration. Sam is unfailingly at the side of his companion. He is loyal to a fault, and a steadfast protector. He is strong whenever his friend is weak. Plus, he cooks. It’s a no-brainer.
- Is it entirely wrong to say Arthur “Boo” Radley from To Kill a Mockingbird? I always felt, like, this weird desire to know more about him. He was made out to be this silent, heroic figure of misunderstood innocence. Don’t you want to make him all better? Sexual healing? No? Hm.
- And, since we’re “iffing” it up, anyway… if I were a lesbian, Kay Scarpetta, of the series of books by Patricia Cornwell. Why? Sheesh, have you read any of these? Because she’s intelligent and disarming, has a hot bod, likes wine, and is an all-around badass.
Whew. That was not so easy to do. It proves I have not been reading enough in quite awhile. And that my brain has become somewhat mushy. (What day is it again?)
But I did it.
I’d be more than happy just to make out with my husband, though, if he would JUST COME HOME.
Yeah, I know, lists/ugh. I've always been bad at accepting compliments, and this is no different. I was surprised and honored by this - someone thinks I've done a good job. Icky Listness aside, that makes me smile. :-)lotus works
lotus supports
lotus is impressed by her friends
lotus digs
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