Mah Mojo, She A-Go-Go Away

It’s true. My mojo is what usually drives me to rant, joke, and jibber-jabber.

But she’s gone.

And I’m feeling like I’m just a shadow of my former self, right now.

My usual M.O. is that I have silly/sarcastic/bitchy/rantlike/dumb thoughts and reactions to things throughout the day, most days, and I share them with you in my posts.

But depression of a special kind has whisked my mojo away to a far-off land and is rubbing its feet and feeding it chocolates, and it does not want to return to me.

Yes, my mojo has taken a page from my book and has become a selfish, self-centered, gluttonous lazy douche.

*sniff*
I’m so proud of that freakin’ bitch.

So, lately, when I’m not crying The Ugly Cry or whipping out some classic Big Fat Ugly Lack of Grace I feel like I’m just “blahing” it through the day.

It’s not that I haven’t had things I wanted to write about, or good ideas for posts.  In fact, I have been having ideas off and on every day… moments where I think, “Ah, I should tell them about this….”

But I’m lacking that “oomph” I had before that actually started the engines.

I still have passing humorous thoughts, but they don’t linger, and when I think about creating a post surrounding one of them, my head starts feeling really heavy and my heart just sighs and doesn’t feel like it.

Clearly, my head and heart are yet another couple of lazy douches. This whole lazy douche thing is really contagious, yeh?

[Aside: Have you ever noticed how often I talk about being a lazy douche? And you thought trolls were good for nothing. Thanks, Dana, for the most fun running gag I've found since talking about my bewbs (aka The Rack). Seriously, trolls are funny.]

Anyway, I’m still here, still bitchyesque and rantalicious with a little happy sillification trying to make its way back in. And I’m sure it will, eventually. Just couldn’t go on living if that didn’t come back, really.

Most of the time my motivation control knob is turned up to a higher level. (In fact, it goes all the way to 11. Unlike most other knobs that only go to 10. When I need an extra push, I can go “one louder” than you losers with only 10….)

But right now, some asshole has me turned down to about 3.

Bear with me… it might take me some time to get back to “full volume.” But I promise I’m going to do my best to grab that knob and try to crank it.

Heh.